Tuesday, February 28, 2017

SPIRITUAL COUNTERATTACKS.. as experienced by (me!) sandra, tvgp

what a trick it is; to feel -safe.    that I can experience it at all, based on my life experiences is, in fact, a miracle.  but I do; sometimes..     feel  -safe.

it doesn't mean I am.    true for you too, isn't it.    you can feel safe, and not be safe.  you can feel threatened, when in fact, you are safe.   -none of us -know. 

when I read certain passages in the Bible, which..   I will research for specific passages later..  but there are many..  God has your back..    You are protected...

and upon my eyes crossing and my mind/spirit digesting any passages related to -feeling protected.. 

my mind will play a ...   less than one second..  viewing of Dr Martin Luther Kind being assassinated.

it is not   (me!) conjuring up, working to make happen..   it just pops into my mind.

God didn't protect Dr Martin Luther King..    

and I have to watch him be murdered.   and then, ...

well, this is a type of spiritual warfare isn't it.     designed to make me feel afraid; live in fear again, question God..

but I am not afraid.  I am not living IN fear.   I know God;  God is not a question mark for (me!)

I live with knowledge; not fear.  


the legacy of Dr Martin Luther King..   cemented.   His physical life; ended, as all of our physical lives will end; in one way or another; some shorter some longer..

but he lives on    - he lives on here on earth, in memory..    he lives on, in heaven, eternally.

even death has lost its sting..           -the perishable are made imperishable...

I have learned to keep my faith   -despite any attack against it.    God already has the victory!

God has already won my heart; my soul; my mind..            -for eternity.

I love and trust God.    -doesn't mean the worst (from human life perspective) won't happen..

but it does mean,  -that even if or when the worst does happen..

God's children RISE ABOVE.

hallelujah & amen!


1 Corinthians 15:54-55New American Standard Bible (NASB)
54 But when this [a]perishable will have put on [b]the imperishable, and this mortal will have put on immortality, then will come about the saying that is written, “Death is swallowed up in victory. 55 O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?”


PREPARING FOR BATTLE.. (me!) sandra, tvgp

spiritual battle.   I have my armor on!

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.


as I have already written in detail: I will bullet point here

I am engaged in spiritual warfare.  I am on a spiritual trek in a spiritual landmine in San Leandro.

it is my responsibility to revisit tragedies and traumas and great suffering that took place in and around here.  I will honor this responsibility  

without getting stuck; without going spiritually backwards

my single motivation is to demonstrate from what dark/ugly/toxic/damaged/worthless pit, God can still reach his hand..

from what depths; the heights!     from what evil..   good can still come!

from what ashes...  beauty!     from what numb/traumatized state..     joy! love! hope!

when God has a hand in it...   WOW!

and God is love..    and God works through people...

so, it is the LOVE from many people, family, friends and strangers..    which has brought me


San Leandro, California, United States of America   2017.

And exactly because I know my spiritual trek, in this spiritual landmine, has the   -potential- to send me backwards

in addition to putting on my spiritual armor, as described in the Bible..   I have quite consciously re-spent time with friends/family dear to (me!)..

this strengthens! and empowers!..   so, phone or in-person visits with my children, my siblings, my nieces and nephew..   my dad, his wife..    dinner w/Sue Regnier; a lunch with Charlotte Severin; a coffee visit with Catherine Teeter and Carla Graci, lunch with Kathy/David Biondi, a phone call with Mary Re, upcoming visit with Lisa Tiner..     tonight:  live music, dancing, visit with Motown, Lana from BSF, and my fellow dancing circle friends...   I am enormously grateful for my family and these friendships!     whether you realize it or not..   you have strengthened me and empowered me for the battle ahead..   I love you!

and God has me write where he wants me.  I know this.   I am with my mom and her husband.  in a loving home; loving environment..    /spoiled, if I could be so honest...     with love, and meals, and conversation, and warriors games together..   it is a pleasure and gift to wake up here, and return here at the end of a honest days work...                /blocking out commute..

and speaking of work..   alden lane!    -so, in between the loving environment I awake in, and return to:    I am in the most beautiful/wonderful working environment ive ever known..!   I have been working since I was 15 years old..         -nothing tops this!   the people; the place..  

this also strengthens and empowers me for the battle ahead.   I know this.

I feel prepared.   I am prepared.   "Thank You!" to everyone who God works through... to everyone who allows God to work through them...

"Thank You Jesus!"    amen.

FULLY EVOLVED HUMAN BEINGS to (me!) sandra, tvgp

Throughout his life, Edhi emphasised the humanitarian, rather than religious, motivation for his work.
His foundation receives "zakat" (Islamic charity) donations, which he used to help Muslims, Christians and Hindus.
Asked why he helped non-Muslims, he said: "Because my ambulance is more Muslim than you."
He also famously lamented: "People have become educated ... but have yet to become human."

**  above is a copy/paste excerpt from link clicked on from google doodle honoring Abdul Sattar Edhi.      -to my knowledge and memory; this is my first introduction to him..    "Thank You!"

***  it is a springboard to repeat, that for me, humanitarians are our most evolved human~beings.   and springboard to repeat, that while I am Christian, and serve Jesus Christ,  -as my declared Lord and Savior..    

The Fruits of the Spirit are non-denominational.  They are spiritual LAWS, which I define as   -that which applies to ALL OF HUMANITY; not exclusive to specific religions; denominations.

love * joy * peace * patience * kindness * goodness * gentleness * faithfulness * self~control.


my religion is Christianity.  my spiritual walk is in love; with effort to master the fruits of the spirit.


that said,  -I have other criteria for defining our most evolved human~beings.  Humanitarianism is way up there!  and mastery of the fruits of the spirit...     and for me, a fully evolved human~being would be free from any/all addictions; any/all notions of superiority or inferiority

character traits such as honesty/integrity are present.  appreciation for life, beauty, art..   and acceptance/appreciation of our temporary physical existence.. an understanding/appreciation for the gift of suffering and self-sacrifice.   a heart/mind which cannot turn its back, or a blind eye to injustices.   a spirit of generosity.   the ability to forgive self and others.   in word and deed; the desire to help others..      goals for bigger picture.. not self-seeking, but leading/collaborating for greater good of all humanity

and all of that..   using different words/different arrangement is already in the Bible.

In Jesus trustworthy name,   amen!



briefly: it is my personal experience; my interpretation of what has taken place inside of me.  -that I have in fact, been involved and am personally engaged in the sanctification process..    in crude brief language: the purification of my soul/spirit

oh! I feel the same as Dr Maya Angelou, in this way...    she said, I paraphrase here, capture the essence:

 "i make 87 mistakes from between the time my feet hit the floor in the morning..  and when I go to bed at night..  and then I forgive myself, and try and do good again the next day"

and I feel that way too...     so many mistakes; some bigger, some smaller..   but each day is a new day.    and where the sanctification takes place

is that, no matter how many mistakes, or what size

the mistakes I make are from

natural human error.   being tired.   being ignorant.   reaching beyond my areas of experience/knowledge.   not fully exercising/tapping into my experience/knowledge.  lack of understanding.   from things I misunderstood to begin with.  accidents.  miscommunications.  trying to hurry.. this could be a longer list, but

the point.

my heart.  my heart is in the write place.  with great consistency, my heart is in the write place..  my mistakes are not born from a desire to hurt or injure or exploit or manipulate or marginalize or control others, in any way; ever..  

sanctification appears to happen in these steps  /again, crude/brief:

-awareness of when behaviors/decisions are born from insecurities; jealousy; hate; fear; addictions... etc.

-slow, incremental change to behaviors/decisions where the origin is from love and with love and toward love.      and for definitions/understanding of what love is..     I might suggest 1 Corinthians, 13 

where,   love really does conquer all...   ALL that yucky stuff like insecurities, jealousy, hate, fear..

where, perfect love, casts out all fear.

sanctification is such a beautiful experience!   so wonderful..    I recommend a prayer

-for those not yet aware/introduced at all, pray, ...   Please introduce me to this mysterious process..   amen.

for Freshmen:   Thank you..   allow me to keep growing..    into knowing..    amen.

for Graduates:  Thank you!   don't let me go...     -you who have started a great work in me..   carry me to completion..   /see:  Philippians 1:6

Sunday, February 26, 2017

keep it real. a poem for the 21st century. by (me!) sandra, tvgp

real vision planted in the soil of your imaginative mind
water it. nurture it.  but first.. you must find.

i love waking up, "thank you!" Jesus..

my eyes sweep the room, with such gratitude..

pictures of people i love; pretty décor above dresser drawers

books, and beautiful fabric on my bed, pillows, and papers, things people have made
                               people have said

my eyes re-sweep the room, with such gratitude..

sculptures, and lotions, and boxes and phone..
                                        the miracle that i get to call this my home..

for a while, i will call this place home.   family love;  -from which ive grown..

God is love; and heavens home..   


re-sweep, re-sweep this room..   with my eyes,
and something happens

when i sweep ALIVE..    something happens, when my eyes sweep green

-this living, growing, breathing thing..

my life attracts to life, i see    -and the real in life; the mystery!

now, look around yourself and see...

the digital, the material, the real: to be or not to be..       search for life, sweep for green..

go interact with a living thing.  

now stop.


put three buildings side by side.   i'll describe for you what's inside:

in the first one, only things ALIVE!   things that breathe; things that die...

living, growing, breathing things..   the 'real'  the 'true'  that makes heart sing..

in building two  -we part fake you,

with things from a distance, which look alive; but were made, in fact, to deceive your mind

"is that flower   ...    real?"      -what a deal!    but how do you know

until you TOUCH & FEEL..    now imagine yourself in a world, where

nothing actually is; but only looks real.     -how does that make you FEEL?

everything in it collects dust; none of it collects memories you cant always trust

and speaking of the unreliable nature of our memories..   that's the perfect Segway to building three:

building three is empty.

-save that pair of goggles you place on your head..   to enter a virtual world instead

where, now..

when you go to touch and feel..   you're still not sure "what's real?"

immersed in a fine art man-made land; where your real mind is highjacked by a virtual hand

anywhere you want to                  they want you to...

to preprogrammed worlds in..    

brain-game lands.    -where nothing ever really breathes.  nothing really dies

but things in there appear so real; you really laugh and cry        /know what i mean?

-you are not faking your reactions; to the real virtual attractions..

/or are you?

what, where...        is the truth?

for a while, i will call this place home.   family love;  -from which ive grown..

God is love; and heavens home..   


and now, what if you were trapped in building three; stuck with goggles on

virtual world  -upon your death..    the virtual world goes on..

what if you were stuck in building two   -where you are the only living thing?
could the fake silk flowers and rubber trees..    still make a caged bird sing?

i use my imagination to help me see..   i use it; it does not use me..

    ~there is something of the awesome between real living things

~there is more to real, and truth and love, and life and death, for me..

there is something so very miraculous in our very real but faulty memories

and you:


for a while, i will call this place home.   family love;  -from which ive grown..

God is love; and heavens home..   


re-sweep, re-sweep this room..   with my eyes,
and something happens

when i sweep ALIVE..    something happens, when my eyes sweep green

-this living, growing, breathing thing..

my life attracts to life, i see    -and the real in life; trust the mystery!

for a while, you will call earth home.  there is real life and real love; you need to know.



Saturday, February 25, 2017

merve griffin and donald trump.. ? remembers (me!) sandra, tvgp

who can fact check for me?  I woke to this memory..    tiny piece of tv footage, with a long lasting impact

Donald trump..   no. wait..  merve griffin purchased real estate from Donald trump  -years ago.. how many, don't know

but what stands out, is how Donald trump used the public platform to make sure everyone knew, merve griffin paid way too much..    the unspoken message:   -I played you..   you are stupid...  look how much I profited off of you..     and trump kept on bragging..    and merve was put in a position to try and defend..

trump's character was so blatantly ugly; his ego/narcissism...   this whole,  i'm superior and will rub your face in it...  humiliate you in public...    the personal pride and braggadocio from successfully exploiting/manipulating

he takes great pride in screwing people over.

everyday I wake up..    "America...  who?!? have you made President of the United States of America..."

  -the skill set required to be a successful business person    -where success is exclusively defined by financial gain; at sometimes any cost

this skill set, which trump does have in abundance..    fits, I suppose, for the capitalism portion of our identity as a country..

/let me interject here, repeat my personal definition of capitalism:   -it is where the amount of money you make is more important than how you make it.

but, anyway..   that skill set, and the skill set required to be the President of the United States of America are NOT THE SAME. 

that capitalism skill set, isn't a good fit, for the DEMOCRACY, identity of our country..

businesses are most often dictatorships..


there are questions of basic character for me..     /lacking..
there are questions of  -basic communication skills...    when I consider the variety of people/leaders from all around the world, all the different cultures, languages..     and see the communication skill set this particular president has to offer...     /also, severely lacking
decision-making..    when I consider the consequences of some of the decisions that have to be made.. how many people/countries, long term/short term consequences..   the amount of things that SHOULD BE CONSIDERED AND FACTORED IN..    vs., Trumps decision-making skill set..  how much time he spends thinking/consulting/considering/weighing...      when the stakes are so high..

and when the stakes are NOT exclusively financial...

  -also, severely lacking

his ability to listen...    

   -and please..   he is not willing to make transparent where he has businesses/business interests around the globe?  his inability/unwillingness to divest interests during his term...

these emolument concerns are entirely valid...

my vote would be to impeach..       let him continue to thrive in the business arena where he clearly belongs


I am currently lacking knowledge myself,   -speaking of consequences, and factoring things in..

upon his impeachment..   which I view as inevitable;

the result of that...

surely it could not be worse.


In Jesus non-partisan name...    amen!

Friday, February 24, 2017

Thursday, February 23, 2017

pleasanton museum's manual typewriter.. for (me!) sandra, rockstar writer...

  I was there just the other day. popped in to see some of charlotte severin's paintings; took in a wonderful exhibit of paintings, photography, jewelry..  and then had the great   -great! pleasure of typing on this magnificent old manual typewriter.  -now, i'm slightly fixated on the idea of owning one..  so much fun!  and the ink was out, so you couldn't see what I was typing, but my fingers said,

"it's all coming back to me...

anyway, I wont go on and on, like id like to, about the importance of tactile experiences and exercises..   but in short.. I can tell you,  -as we move away from this into our digital/virtual; mind consuming but tactile-deficient world     -well, I do notice it creates a certain longing for; and appreciation of..

anyway..  had a wonderful visit also with three women at the museum; delightful!  Trudy, Cheree, & Beverly    -more on that later,

for now..  this experience made me remember,  -the awe factor the first time I saw my mom type on an  -electric- typewriter..    so fast! like smoke coming up from the keyboard..    I compare it to.. if you saw someone on a tricycle..   and then later, on a Harley..     -stand back man..

and it made me want to pull from my archives the following:


Saturday, July 06, 2013

  ROCK STAR WRITER a poem by (me!) sandra, tvgp      

where did you two meet?

and how did you know?

these are two vital questions
when the answer is...  true love.

we met, i say, /with a wink and smile

"..at a hotel.   -i worked the front desk, and he was there on business."

it's true.

debbie introduced and i was instantly! seduced.

so long and sleek, quiet and shy..
that irristible skin and those tender black i's

this hp is made for (me!)
i when i say that, i mean that  -quite literally

how i love thee, love thee, love thee!
write now! forever! permanently!

yes, i was made for you, and you for (me!)

and when i say that, i mean that   -quite literally

as if,

as if someone measured my individual fingers, my write and left hand
as if someone, a designer, who really understands

who without request, and without demand
put my wildest dream in the palm of my hands

"i love you!"   "i love you!" types both of my hands
i'm a rock star writer, in a poetry band

yes,  i am the keyboard wizard!

i stand like a statue
become part of this machine
feeling all the letters
always typing clean
write by intuition
the blog counters fall
i'm a deaf, dumb and blind girl
but i sure play a mean keyboard...

dun ta da

you are comin' with me 
everywhere i go

from this day forward   -that's all i know

and i still need a monitor
and a computer too

but nothing seems impossible now that i've met you.

you make me feel
like a rock star writer in a poetry band
like my wildest dreams are in the palm of my hands

i'll put a strap on you baby
we'll tour the land

"i love you!"  "i love you!"  types both of my hands.


Thursday, March 05, 2015

ROCKSTAR WRITER as seen by (me!) sandra, tvgp

i think i have a poem by the same name; or very close.  written after my fingers touched a keyboard that seemed immediately custom made for my hands.. the greatest fit ever..  smooth beyond belief. and within that poem i also change the words a little and reference elton johns, pinball wizard song.
I'd give anything if i could attach a device to my brain which would allow me to share with you the music video that plays in my mind when i  hear that song.   i believe such a technology will one day exist because for 1.  the visuals that play in my mind are so vivid and clear and 2. its the exact direction everything is heading; access inside the brains and minds..
like anything and everything else; it will also be used for both good and evil.  and like everything else, it will primarily be used for good; just never exclusively.   <----- afraid.="" condition="" i="" m="" of="" p="" permanent="" this="" world="">
anyway.. allow me here to imagine it, and imagine it used for the good:  what a cool music video plays in my mind!
please play pinball wizard song in the background. it triggers the video; the images.  they never appear without music; nor to any other song.
forgive the ego; i am the star of this particular video.  it starts when i am very young. you see me as a child learning to write on that very large lined tan paper, with red hyphen size lines and thick blue lines which are there to guide children in learning the size of capital letter vs. lower case and to write straight across the page vs. how writing tends to tilt on a blank page.
and so, there i am..  learning to hand-write; awkward at first; gradually improving as all children do.
and you see me writing for school, -but also, more importantly, writing at home; in my own notebook for my own pleasure
-because i can.
and then it speeds through my elementary, middle school, and high school years..  always writing..  school, home..  home, school,  -helping others with their writing assignments..
and the tools change, exactly as they have changed during the course of my life:
pencil to lined paper.
pen to blank paper.
manual typewriter.
electric typewriter.
PC keyboard.
laptop (keyboard attached)
back to detached keyboard; plastic
glass keyboard (i-pad)
to phone..
the tiny glass keyboard you can only two thumb type on.
but i see myself.. no matter where.. school, home, college, work..  writing, writing, writing..
filling shelves worth of journals.. then a big fire where I toss them all in..
new journals..
then articles for the newspapers..  marketing brochures, emails, resumes, poems, short stories... 
during certain parts of the song; especially the opening..
i see myself typing write-handed, left-handed, on a table, behind my back, writing with one hand while the other hand does some other task.  playing the computer keyboard the way the great entertainers play the piano.. standing up, sitting down, hitting keys with my feet, spinning around.. backwards, sideways..    then i strum the keyboard like a guitar..i am a rockstar..and do the big circle gesture with my arm i think peter frampton is famous for..
"...that deaf, dumb and blind girl...
SHE sure plays a mean keyboard...
how do you think SHE does it?   i don't know.  -what makes her so good?
SHE ain't got no distractions, can't hear no buzz or bells.."
/during that part.. i  see myself typing up a storm with my young kids all active around me but i  am oblivious..
"..always gets a replay, -never tilts at all..."
it's like a really cool music video if i  do say so myself.
and me being (me!)..   i can't help but be fascinated with our ability. -that is, the ability within all of us
to have this amazing movie screen in our imaginations entirely separate from the practical outside world; private if we choose
-or manifest into actual movies, music videos, if we want and can..
-this particular song triggers what I've just described
-more and very often, i see entire large dance teams in amazingly choreographed numbers to any given song i might be listening to..
in the real world, you have to first actually choreograph a number.. then practice, then perform
in my imagination all of the prep work has already been done. i just get to see awesome! amazing! fantastic performances by what appear to be the worlds greatest dancers..
of course! i wish you could see them too!

Wednesday, February 22, 2017

BOYS to MEN by (me!) sandra, tvgp

and, yes,

so, I was going over in my mind again..   -relationships.

and I was like,

parents/good..  love has only grown.
children/good..  love has only grown.
siblings/good.. love has only grown.
friendships/good..  love has only grown.
neighbors/coworkers/passersby..   good/good/good..

so, what is it about...  romantic relationships?   -spouses?   on/off..   never, good and love grows.. but rather good, great.. good, bad, worse, horrific, get me out of here.

hmmm, what thing separates, distinguishes romantic relationships from all the other ones?  ...there must be something...

OH!  of course...   it's SEX.    all my good, positive and thriving relationships do not involve sex!

SEX is the problem..    well/it's never a problem..

rather, ..  that IS the one thing that distinguishes spousal/romantic relationships from all the other types of relationships in my life that are successful..


obviously, I started to entertain the idea of having a romantic relationship..  'that just doesn't involve sex!'             

but by the time I arrived to my destination and parked, I said to myself

  -that's okay.  I'm fine with a few more breaks in my heart.


In I think I heard Jesus laughing..  's   name.   amen!


speaking of...

i'm going easy on myself..   so, my first two pilgrimage visits here in san leandro, were  #1 Rasputin music    -and, wow! the amount of CD and DVD covers in any given aisle I was able to recognize..

there is a lot of music and images stored in this brain of mine..    but the other thing worth mentioning, to any single people attracted to men..     -forget the church social, or the local bar..    and head to Rasputin..   there were a lot of men in there..

Every time I move I lose...when I look I'm in
And every time I turn around...I'm back in love again
(right back, right back...in love again...seems like, seems like)
That I'm back in love...again


then, I had to stroll through, the new starbucks, which is in the same lot as Rasputin..   -said a telepathic 'hello' to Russell..    

-this starbucks used to be..   if I am remembering correctly, and that is anybody's guess:  but I believe it was called Doggy Diner (?)    -and, when I was a teenager, I used to have my dad drive me there so I could order a hot dog and coke from ... Russell...     /can't remember last name..   remember blond hair, cute face..   voice.    and I remember my dad making several efforts to explain to me..   in his own words:   don't chase the boys..  let the boys chase you...      but, they were never fast enough, so I would help them out...


also...   did a little stroll through Southland Mall with my beautiful mom..   THE! place to hangout as a teenager growing up in Hayward..     need to re-connect with sue-sue for detail in my vague memories..    maybe I can get a guest visit from mary (gerace) re here in comments..     or my brother...    or sister...

all I would need to do is say...   ~roundtable.

and, the tattoo on my face, matches one of the symbols on the Warriors Chinese New Year inspired jerseys..    which, apparently, with the second symbol in Chinese = Warrior.   But, with just the one symbol, Japanese translation =  courage/bravery..    or, as I like to share:   "conquer the world with kindness."

anyway..  as I love the Warriors, and this particular jersey, I thought.. 

"i'm sorry...   did you just say  ONE HUNDRED AND TEN DOLLARS...?!?

  -so, just took a picture with it instead.

   and the music/song/lyrics that surfaced here was..   Macklemore

 They be like, Oh, that Gucci NBA... That's hella tight
I'm like, Yo that's fifty dollars ONE HUNDRED AND TEN DOLLARS for a T-shirt
Limited edition, let's do some simple addition
Fifty dollars  ONE HUNDRED AND TEN DOLLARS for a T-shirt, that's just some ignorant bitch (Shit)
I call that getting swindled and pimped (Shit)
I call that getting tricked by a business

  Yes.. this jersey is a~ hella~dope

but..  look at my hardwork, my paycheck..  this jersey is a~hella~nope.


Tuesday, February 21, 2017

ive got a write to be wrong... (me!) sandra, tvgp

from the playlist storage in my mind, the soundtrack for this post directs me to:

joss stone.


rick cahall:  "what year is your jeep again?"

(me!):   "2002"

rick:  "how much did you pay for it?"

(me!):   "well, it goes like this..   way too much.  but the thing is..   my Saturn hybrid barely made it on to the lot for a trade-in..  my prayer was just that I could drive it there, and not have to have it towed; k.   and my credit score was like, 2...     and my negotiation skills  -zero.

and when you add that all together..   you pay a few thousand dollars more than you are supposed to, but that's just the way that ball bounces."


honestly, I was so emotionally exhausted...   sometimes you just have to choose..   not only how to spend your money, but

your energy; your time..     /if more people understood the true cost...

in this case..   I had zero energy, zero time, zero patience, for the bs of going back and forth, and back and forth with numbers written on paper...  let me go see my supervisor...   this is the best I can do... but, no wait.. let me go see again...

such a stupid game.     and, so the very first offer, I said, "sounds great. where do I sign..   get me out of here.."


and I love my jeep blue see.   oh! the gas is killing me..  but, ive never felt safer..  I love being high up, and the windows! such a grand view in every direction..  and the tires! especially in this belated el nino flash flood environment we are currently enduring..  and for the life-threatening commutes..

and, all write..   the air conditioning/heating unit is out..

and.. what a funny idiosyncrasy it has developed:   and how proud I am of myself for figuring out how to..

well, what happen is that it started to beep, beep, beep..   out of nowhere.  and for the life of me, I could not figure out how to get it to "STOP!"   "SHUT UP!"    "TURN OFF!!




  -and I was allowing myself to be quite dangerously distracted by this annoying beep, while I was driving on the freeway..   looking here and there... pressing every button..  trying so hard to get it to "SHUT UP!"

then I kicked into,  -is shutting this noise off, worth crashing  -because that is what is going to happen if you keep..

and I decided to test myself.. to see just how undistracted I could be...    and tried to sing a long to the music, and just ignore...

so, one time, I successfully ignored the beep, beep, beep, all the way from Livermore to San Leandro.

this is also a very important skill set...     so, maybe my negotiation skills are lacking, but..

when it comes to the ability to not let potentially dangerous annoying things/people distract me from the task at hand..

I give myself an A++

[and what is the car salespersons skill set anyway...   mastering the art of taking the most financial advantage of a less skilled/ financially vulnerable fellow human being?    -I would not be proud of that...      but, I'm interested in testing/I'm curious..   like, what is the maximum amount a trained salesperson would let an untrained customer pay; and still maintain good conscience?

-for the record..  they were wonderful/helpful..    my experience positive; I'm only making a few points...


anyway, I don't know how.. it was accidental the way I figured out..

really?!?    that's all I have to do?    serious?

-because it turns out, anytime the beep starts..  if I click the turn signal just one time, up, like I'm about to make a write turn

it stops.

-for at least a couple miles..

and then when it starts again...     one click/write turn...   stop.   like magic!   who knew...  

it was a very exciting discovery I must say.


I haven't figured out why it beeps.  and I haven't figured out how to get it to stop completely.


I am in this pattern now...    anytime the beeping begins: I immediately hit the signal up, like I'm about to make a quick write turn

   -so, if you are among those drivers who happen to be behind me, when the beeping starts

I realize

it must look like i'm about to turn write into a house, or hill, or building, or giant truck..

     "why is her signal on?  you cant turn write here!  there is not even a road...

is she drunk?    is there some hanky~panky going on in that jeep?"

but, no..   when you see the wink of my write red tail blinker light

I am just living in harmony with ...   I am just co~existing with my jeep blue see's idiosyncrasy

and that! is a good skill to have too..    a very important life skill indeed!

can you imagine if we all learned to live with each other's idiosyncrasies instead of trying to fix everything and everyone to death all the time..

   [sparing you my dissertation on the importance of letting steph curry chew on his mouth guard; but let that be one of the lessons]



I process it now, like a neurological stress test of sorts..

because it is one very easy thing, now that I know the secret to temporarily stopping the beeping sound,  -on a clear day, on a beautiful road I have all to myself, with blue skies and no traffic.. and a great song playing..

it is very easy under those circumstances, to hear the beep and immediately click the signal.


after a long, taxing day...  when I'm super tired...   and it is very dark out...   and the rain is pouring down hard; relentless..  and the traffic is thick...   and the only thing on the radio is another annoying commercial..

and then add the BEEP...

and all of that describes my drive home from work last night.  and i'd like to close by saying "Thank You Jesus!"    -and giving myself another  A++.

SHE's making a write turn!   out of nowhere!

hallelujah! & amen!


gotta love these lyrics:
 joss stone..    slight personalization edits, by (me!)..

I've got a write to be wrong
My mistakes will make me strong
I'm stepping out into the great unknown
I'm feeling wings though I've never flown
I've got a mind of my own
I'm flesh and blood to the bone
I'm not made of stone
Got a write to be wrong
So just leave (me!) alone
I've got a write to be wrong
I've been held down too long
I've got to break free
So I can finally breathe
I've got a write to be wrong

Got to sing my own song
I might be singing out of key
But it sure feels good to (me!)
Got a write to be wrong
So just leave (me!) alone
You're entitled to your opinion
But it's really my decision
I can't turn back I'm on a mission
If you care don't you dare blur my vision
Let (me!) be all that I can be
Don't smother (me!) with negativity
Whatever's out there waiting for (me!)
I'm going to face it willingly


Monday, February 20, 2017

public "thank you!" to (jacquie williams~courtright!) from (me!) sandra, tvgp

when I started at alden lane in june, -one of the first things I learned was that the owner, Jacquie, -well, she herself, bakes these awesome delicious cakes for each employee  -and not just for birthdays, but for the young adults leaving for college..  

and, the goodbyes are made just a little bit easier with a fork-full of deliciousness..

and that is my confession..    when Rachel mentioned she would be leaving for France...   my first reaction was.. ~how much i'm going to miss you..

but quicker than I'm willing to admit, my mind bounced to:  "that means there will be cake!"


and my mom asked me..   if Jacquie made one cake for all the February birthdays, and I had the pleasure of sharing, that no..

she makes a cake for each individual person and birthday AND! you get to pick from a menu.. whatever your favorite is, even special requests..

and, ive got to get myself ready for work write now, so i'll close by saying..   I know my cakes.  and these cakes she makes; that frosting!    -amazing!

"thank you!!"     ~xoxo    sandra

to jennifer lash, from (me!) sandra, tvgp

Hi Jennifer,  Kissin' The Chocolate Blues was performed one night only, with permission, at the Firehouse Art Center, a 240 seat theater, during my term as Poet Laureate for Pleasanton, California, on a $500 budget. The response from the audience was a playwrite's dream

"so powerful! Dr Maya Angelou has to see this!"   "Does Oprah know about this..?  "You have to get this on film..."   "i always liked Dr Maya Angelou, but now I LOVE her!"  and, somewhere in my email archives, very positive responses from local book club members who attended the event and who said they were inspired to write rave reviews to Dr Maya Angelou, and Oprah and friends in the industry.

I believe it deserves professional backing, and should be performed again...   and again...   and again, for audiences all around the world, and I do dream of having the opportunity to reunite the 3 woman cast:  Faith Alpher, as Dr Maya Angelou, myself/narrator, and Jessica Reaber, musician, and perform/audition for potential producers, who will see, it has the potential to pack the house of the Royal Albert Hall..   and inspire standing ovations on Broadway...

and, I see you are Director of Music Licensing..   The song I dedicate to Dr Maya Angelou, in Kissin' The Chocolate Blues, is KT Tunstall's song:   Suddenly I See.   -Are the lyrics not perfect!!  Her face came immediately to my mind, and still does, every time I hear that song...  "She's got the power to be, the power to give.. the power to see.. yeah, yeah, yeah"    Of course, I dream KT Tunstall herself could be in the performance

/I am like a professional day~dreamer...       anyway,

That is my dream.  But  -as it is just a dream, I know that regardless, the script itself, should be with Dr Maya Angelou's legacy keepers.   I did mail my original script to what I hope was her office at Wake Forest University, that was in Feb of 2013. Where/with who this ultimately landed, I do not know.

Blessings to you Jennifer Lash,

Sandra Harrison Kay, literary & mixed media artist
925 337 2320

Sunday, February 19, 2017

inbetween customers... (me!) sandra, tvgp

"okay... yes, thank you...  you be sure and have a nice day..."


Stephen Colbert:   "...  that was something we didn't know...   and how 'bout foreign languages..  do you speak any other languages?"

(me!):  "Itchi gitchi ya ya da da.  Itchi gitchi ya ya here. Mocha-choca-lata ya ya.

and, Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir....   "  but that's about it."

Stephen Colbert.. /laughs..     "that's all you need to know... actually...    but do you have any idea what that means..?"

(me!): " no, I can't actually translate; I can only interpretative dance.  actually...   my special skill is being able to speak two different English Languages..

Stephen Colbert:   /lifting only one eyebrow..     "okay..  let's here it..."

(me!):  "well, it is very obvious to me, that intelligence and comedy are two of your God-given gifts..

-that's Christian~ese...

and, then..

it is very obvious, that in the before of some gazillion rotations of the earth ...  when two forces manifested out of nowhere, and happen to collide, despite infinite space,  at the exact speed and gforce necessary for some kind of random big bang to happen that would ultimately create organized universes, galaxies..  and result eventually in human life..    -that, skip, skip, skip to my you...   the entire series of events, made it so that when your parents united...       -that unique set of x's, oh's and y-nots made you somehow highly intelligent, handsome and funny

that's secular~ese."


next customer...   "hi, how are you today...   

to colin johnson, bob hercules, rita coburn whack, caged bird legacy.. from (me!) sandra, tvgp

I am the playwrite of, "Kissin' The Chocolate Blues" an onstage valentine I wrote to properly thank Dr Maya Angelou for the gargantuan ways she influenced my life/my writing; and helped our whole world.

Kissin' The Chocolate Blues was written to share; to entertain; to inspire and to thank..

It shares how I first became enthralled with her work, and set out to meet, get an autograph book and a picture..

this quest becoming its own adventure; several attempts and lasting over 30 years..

I want to share the script; the performance -and make this story available..

it belongs with her legacy keepers..

Please contact me,
Sandra Harrison Kay, literary & mixed media artist

Saturday, February 18, 2017

HYPOCRISY Report Card. for (me!) sandra, tvgp

the list is much longer than I will admit.  but here's two:

 -you know how I like to lightheartedly joke,  -every time something goes wrong, "that's because they didn't ask me first!  -had they asked me.. I could have spared them...  /this or that.."

but these days, I'm like "stop asking me!  I don't want to fill out one more frickin' survey"...   my God, don't you have some clue as to how you're doing?!   -self assess already..  ask a few people...   how much feedback, from how many people, on how many things?

but this is because I can't seem to make a move, order a product online, visit a counter at a store, purchase a product at a kiosk,  eat at a restaurant...    -I can't seem to rent a movie, borrow a book, or send a letter, without my action being followed up with a questionnaire or form to fill out..       it is absolute overkill.

and, very important that I create one myself so I can know how I can improve my blog...


also, I really like his beard.   and i don't get a vote, but if i did, i would vote, keep the beard.  it looks very attractive.

and, but..   if the person with the beard said to me..   i liked your hair..  /whatever.. blond, brunette...     you should keep it that way, it looked very attractive

i would be like,  "well, that's too bad isn't it.  i like it gray."


new page:   highly interested in davis's website, and the entire field of IPM

if i had the time and money i would put down the novel I'm currently reading, quit my job, and read the website full-time

but only to mine for analogies... 

i'll be back to correct/amend..   I'm writing pre-maturely.. but,

really, it's all about learning how to create healthy environments in the natural world... identify pests and insects.. determine whether they are a help or hindrance to a given garden/plant/tree/flower.. farm

whether you should attract, or repel..   or co-exist with given creatures...

which are immediate threats...    which are beneficial..    on and on..

and of course I'm fascinated with the knowledge of how color/aroma can be used to manipulate whether you attract or repel..

or set boundaries..

control populations..

and there are lighthearted conversations at alden lane, where we discuss..   the effect of hormones/pheromones in humans.. how we send these signals, and don't even know..

and, so of course, I'm so curious..  i mean i know how to attract a man.. but, what scent do i need to generate or wear to attract a Christian, loyal, monogamous...   honest, kind, funny...  hard-working.. loving...

    i need to put some copper tape...   around my heart...   and spray something that kills the desires of players/liars..   but attracts...      /and if it weren't for work, these little imagination movies would have no end..

newish page:

all of this is going on in the human population everyday..

and   -as the name itself indicates-   "potter's touch"   "potters house"    -Bishop T.D. Jakes..   

there are lots of teachings where the analogy of a potter and clay are used to describe the relationship between God and his children..

but i am absolutely convinced the best analogy is gardener and garden..    /and didn't it all get started..

God as the ultimate gardener..    we, as plants, flowers, trees..

and God knows, for each individual, the exact amount of air, water, sun, shade, attention, ...   the write soil conditions..   what to use to attract; to create concern/awareness; which things to remove; which to amend..  where to set boundaries..   when to prune, when to let go wild...  indoors/outdoors..  climate/temperature...  hover vs. ignore..   moisture levels...  on and on...

so that each individual can become/realize their full potential..

there are a million analogies!!    but it is when we connect, through prayer/meditation..  that we can heed the information and work in collaboration..

plus..  mine the Bible for garden references...    its saturated in references to the earth..  gardens.. vineyards..  the natural world..

ive already noted:  sun is to plants; as attention is to humans..  (shade/introverts; sun/performers)

and i'm pretty sure:  money is to humans; as water is to plants...  (overwatering causes...   underwatering causes..)

and i kinda think:   air is analogous to love..   (mandatory for all... and the more pure/fresh the better)

pruning  -getting rid of any unhealthy relationships/counterproductive thinking; conquering addictions..     becoming free from bugs like, fear/insecurities...

and i am entertaining/pondering the idea, that sanctification in humans, is like..   well, the ultimate horticulturist already knows, how much of this &; that...  to reach full potential...

sanctification seems to me..  kinda like, when the perfect amount of everything...   sun/shade; nutrients; pruning..   time/seasons...   care/attention...    weeding..   amending...

when it all combines to bring out the best...


and i will conclude with this:

for me...   this is the single most beautiful house plant I ever have seen..   i mean, it is just spectacular!!   and, in my heart, the desire..

the desire would be to snatch it up and bring it home with me.. and set it..  anywhere..  anywhere my eyes could land on it every morning.. and when i return home from work

but you can't just snatch it up.. and put it anywhere you want.

it has certain environmental requirements if it is expected to thrive..

horticulturists have already learned how much light, how much water, how much space...  what soil..

it wont just grow anywhere.. under any circumstance   /but some plants will!

and so, i thought to myself..  after learning more about this plants specific requirements,

i thought to myself...  i day~dreamed:   if i had the money and time and resources..

 i would design my entire custom built home around the needs of this gorgeous, spectacular house plant...


In Jesus mustard seed is planted in you's name...  amen!

Friday, February 17, 2017

SPIRITUAL ENCOUNTERS of every single be-kind by (me!) sandra, tvgp

with every single encounter between two human beings

  -and it does not matter who

between a shopper and cashier

between a person asking directions and a person answering

between a young and old person

between lovers, between family, between friends, between complete strangers...

pluck any two people from any part of the world. even if they do not speak the same language:

  -with every single encounter between two human beings; there is a spiritual exchange.

it is far more complicated than i'm about to describe, but exactly for simplicity's sake:

person A,  arrives at encounter already feeling either  -good, -bad, -or neutral  depending on their life circumstances

person B, is also already feeling, -good  -bad, or neutral based on their unique circumstances

and if they regard one another even just in passing...    or if they engage in any conversation/communication of any kind, for any length

the status of the state they arrived in..    alters.    sometimes, microscopic in scale, sometimes in big and obvious ways

but no encounter/exchange between two human beings is immune from some level of effect; there is always an impact; a subtle shift; only sometimes it is easily detectable

but -after the encounter

person A and B are either in the same state as they arrived but to a higher or lower degree, or their state has shifted completely, from feeling bad to good, or vice versa..

some people are conscious of this spiritual exchange taking place; many are not.

Dr Maya Angelou, for example, once she was old and mature and evolved enough, -past her turbulent youth,

 she became quite conscious this spiritual exchange was taking place and made it a personal practice to see to it, that anyone who came into her personal sphere would leave in better shape than they arrived.  her presence, her words, her gestures, her expressions

she communicated with everything she had in a way that resulted in others feeling better

about themselves, and the world in general.   people feeling bad, would feel better.  people feeling neutral would feel good, and people already feeling good would, in the aftermath of a Dr Maya Angelou encounter,   -feel like they could take on the world

she lifted the spirits of an incalculable number of people in her lifetime.

even when her intent   -even when she consciously desired to make someone feel worse; she did it with the intention of helping them to evolve..  learn respect, manners, social graces necessary for improving the world

it is well known, upon hearing a racist joke told at a gathering in her home, that she abruptly demanded the person leave

  -there was no apologizing on the spot for redemption

she made sure the impact was felt   -and racist joke telling people had proper time to really think seriously about what they were casually laughing about


as an observer and participator in life, I have a heightened sensitivity to this spiritual exchange taking place  -sometimes in nano-seconds, and sometimes over long visits and conversations

and what a wonderful world it is, when everyone lifts everyone else..

it is a good practice; a good exercise, just to pay attention:

how do you feel  -after-  spending time in (variable person) presence and company?

and perhaps even more important:    how do people feel after spending time with you?


and may I quote here, Bishop T.D. Jakes  "...  can I go deeper?"   -this is more complicated also, than I'm about to make it, but..

when Dr Maya Angelou consciously/intentionally wanted to make a person feel worse.. it was to help them improve/grow...

there are many people who make other people feel worse, but it is to make themselves feel better/superior..    that is an ugly spiritual exchange, but common

when Dr Maya Angelou consciously/intentionally wanted to lift your spirits and help you feel better, it was because she knew you underestimated your own value, strengths, contributions..   significance, capabilities

there are many people who make other people feel better, but it is to manipulate for personal gain.  this is also an ugly spiritual exchange, but common.


so for those who want to go a little deeper,

you not only ask yourself,  how do I feel after spending time with so n' so,  -but why?   and, when you set out to make a person feel better...     why?  what are your motivations?

genuine humanitarians   -our most evolved human beings     /and notice here I must employ the word genuine..

genuine humanitarians are conscious of this spiritual exchange; and use every communication tool -words, tone,  eye contact, gesture, body language of every kind; to elevate the individuals they come in contact with, and thereby improve the world

everyone else should be on the path to arrive there...

** deeper still **

I am re-stating in different words now/previous lesson:  when person A consciously (or not) makes person B feel less than; insecure in any way.. with ill intention [to feel superior; to control/manipulate; from jealousy, spite, lack of character/love, maturity]   -the importance of person B becoming impervious to these attacks..    this skill is one of the single most important skills a person can attain.   especially in this current world of social media, where attacks from less evolved humans are a pandemic...

we do not arrive here with this skill. children and young people must be taught to acquire...  it is more important, in my opinion, than any academic ...  or rather I should say,  -without this skill; the rest of our education is a waste...


In Jesus motivations are pure  's  name,   amen!

/do you think he just wanted to sell books?  be popular? profit off of Bible sales?  make money off of speaking engagements and tours?   what motivated Jesus...

sermon on the mount?   the beatitudes...

Thursday, February 16, 2017

Trust God. Believe in Yourself. review by (me!) sandra, tvgp

these things will combine to help you make decisions, if you give me just a minute...

PART ONE:  on several occasions Joyce Meyers has taught about the importance of sticking things out:  remaining in your marriage, even when it gets difficult.   remaining at your job, even when it gets tough.   etc., etc.,

and she will say, "someone else might gladly take your husband just so they don't have to eat alone."   -or, "someone else might be glad to have your job..."

but she has also shared, she herself is divorced and remarried, and she also shares how she accepted a job as a pre-school teacher, and only lasted about 3 hours      /something like that..

and each one of us, will have occasions   -multiple occasions, when we have to decide whether to stick something out, or cut losses and move on...

pay close attention to HOW you make these decisions..     best case/worst case scenarios of seeing something through; best case/worst case scenario of cutting losses, moving forward

Joyce teaches, not to let your feelings/emotions dictate your decision...

it is my experience and observations, that most people already know the answer, in any given situation, but spend a great deal of time and energy contemplating anyway..

so, i'm fascinated when Joyce Meyer talks about her very brief time as a pre-school teacher:  why did she not internally argue with her desire to leave?   why did she not  -stick it out, and consider it a potential and important time to learn greater patience; endurance; adult/child relationship building..  

she bailed.   -and, yet..   teaches valid lessons on the virtues of staying in that job you hate.


               -she later explains..       she did not feel the anointing for that position...


PART TWO: i recently complemented a co-worker friend on his merchandising   -it looks fantastic, his St Patricks themed display

he commented that he does his best work when he doesn't think about it   -just does it.

   -that!   is a master level skill set.   when you no longer have to think; you just do.

what was once cumbersome, slow, awkward..   becomes pure instinct

the process is best captured by repeating what i heard mike Meyers repeat/quote:


at the start you are:   UNconsciously INcompetent    (you don't even know, you don't know..)

next you become:  CONSCIOUSLY INcompetent (aware you have some learning to do; need practice)

via practice/repetition you then become:  CONSCIOUSLY COMPETENT  (aware you are gaining mastery)

until, at the master level you are:   UNCONSCIOUSLY COMPETENT   -this is when you are operating out of pure instinct..  you don't think about it; practice and repetition allow you to

just do it.

excellent examples:   learning to tie your shoe, as a child.   learning to drive, as a young adult..

learning the art of friendly conversation..


CAVEAT BEING:   even through practice, dedication, repetition...    i could not become a steph curry, or tiger woods, or prima ballerina, or a mozart..


you must also be operating in collaboration with your God given gifts and talents.

so, discovering what your God given gifts and talents are...

this becomes quite a pleasurable responsibility in achieving what it is you are ultimately looking for

-doesn't it.

and lining these things up:   gifts/talents, with creative process..

that is when you just can't lose, even if you tried.


so, when it comes to sticking it out, or cutting your losses

Trust your God given heart; Believe in yourself...     you already know the answer.


In Jesus brought (me!) this far for good reasons...  name,   amen!

Wednesday, February 15, 2017

from the archives... for (david pogue) by (me!) sandra, tvgp

Thursday, July 30, 2015

fun things to think about for (me!) sandra, tvgp

im pretty fresh off watching NOVA's what makes us human? program. -great show. very well done. im quite fond of the host who i know from watching CBS Sunday Morning..  

its all very intriguing and entertaining.. and the primary focus of this particular show, in regards to what separates humans from animals was...

language & laughter.  

and, i mean really.. they nailed it didn't they.. because when was the last time you heard an elephant tell a good joke?

anyway.. distinctions between animals and humans.. that's what my mind was contemplating as i drifted off to sleep last night...

"contemplating!".  -hey.. animals don't contemplate do they?  i wonder..

" wonder!".  -do animals wonder where their next meal is coming from?   -wonder what will happen if they sleep all day vs. go out in the wild? -wonder what direction they should take? decision they should make? 

-do wild animals ever get wild ideas?  and then discuss the pros and cons..   do they have regrets?   are they ever self-conscious about their appearance?  

are there any animals who use forest fires to have a big BBQ?  and cook their prey instead of having to eat it raw all the time..

I mean, how unsanitary..      "sanitation!".   hmm,  what does separate us humans from other animals species?

" transportation!".   -do birds fly because they can get there faster? and do they ever stop anywhere along the way just because its beautiful?  do they ever change their minds?

are there any animals with faith or belief systems? who are "curious!" about the origin of their existence? whether or not they have any famous relatives?

  and speaking of relatives.. our closest relatives; the apes..  how come some populations have, in theory, evolved into humans while other populations remain apes? if we "time travel!" into the future.. in what year have all the monkeys and apes finally learned to stand up, shave and wipe their ass? 

do animals have any concept of our time in history? calendars? -remember birthdays?  -get sentimental...   stare up at the stars and "wish!" they could "explore!" outer space...  

are there any animals who have been "inspired!" to draw or take pictures.. or the equivalent.. to try and re-capture a scene in nature..

are there any animals who point at something  "on purpose!" so other animals will look in that direction  -and then run.. 

do animals have secrets?  hopes and dreams?  do animals pray?   meditate? 

i haven't "studied!" animals in any "great depth!" but..    are there any animals who trade? negotiate? barter?

-like, are there any animals who use there skill sets/instincts "gifts! & talents!" as a form of "currency!"   -and "place value!" on this to trade for that?

can animals "believe!" things they do not know..

are there any animals "conscious of their consciousness?  ..of their conscience?...

are there any animals that are also.. " trend setters!".

like,  (yawn) ... i wonder..  does one animal look at another animal.. (stretch..turn off lights.. return to bed) and "think!".. 

i like your mangled hairstyle... how can I get my mane to look like that?   ...is that where the term copy-cat came from...?

democracy.. free speech.. freedom of religion...scientific method..  chocolate... coffee..  ZZZzzzzz.....

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

HAPPY VALENTINES from (me!) sandra, tvgp

everyone i love
knows how much i love them.

~of this i am quite proud.

Dear Almost Every Woman I Know, from (me!) sandra, tvgp

I want to say this is worth repeating, but despite repeating...   so, it makes me wonder.  but here you go:

I am a devoted student of joyce meyer.  will be for life.  yesterday on the show, however..  twas easy to skip

joyce and three other women discussing ... "how awful..! the pressure put on women to look beautiful..    -how studies show the self esteem of women drops significantly after just 3 minutes of looking at  magazines   -where the beauty of the model is not even real to begin with..  a lot of photo editing..."

and here is the very, very sad part to me.   -this conversation was taking place in the 1970's, and in the 1980's, and in the 1990's, and in 2000...   and here we are in 2017...

 -for the record, I stopped looking at the magazines a decade ago..  I feel wonderful. happy. beautiful.  -just as I am.   the smartest, greatest, most successful diet I ever went on was

a mass media diet.  no consumer magazines.   and I keep wondering how long it will take everyone else to see they are creating and re-creating their own same problem..  and complaining about it ad nauseam, but not doing a thing to fix or solve...

it fascinates me.

In,   -when Jesus doesn't do anything about it... it is probably because YOU CAN...'s name..


Monday, February 13, 2017

"Happy Birthday to (me!)..." -from (stevie wonder!)

i have two favorite versions of the famous birthday song, stevie wonder's, and bear in the big blue house..    so, they take turns playing in my mind while i ready myself for work today..

as does prince's, lets go crazy song, and steven tyler's dream on song.

more later..

in.  if Jesus had a personal favorite playlist's name....    amen!

Sunday, February 12, 2017

'im gonna grow (me!) some potatoes!" -sandra. seasoned cashier; tyro farmer/gardener

and so a family came up to me at the cash register at alden lane.  they had a few potatoes in a white paper bag:

"are these potatoes okay to eat?"

and with a smile, I said, "well,  if it were me, I would just pop those babies in a microwave, pour on some cheese and bacon...  

but I'm just a cashier.. let me go find an expert."

and so, alex was the nearest by.   oh! if you could have seen his expression..

"are these okay to eat?"


now, the entire question to me was a little..      like, what possible reason would there be to not eat these potatoes?   -they come from alden lane, not some..  spray-painted; profit-tainted.. origins unknown shelf in a gold fish store swallowed by a shark..    -write

and, yet intuitively I knew the question was entirely valid; I just didn't know why


alex, for those of you who have not yet had the pleasure of making his acquaintance..   he is very knowledgeable.

and accurate.   and thorough.    another way I can introduce him, is to say, he is the opposite of a person who gives yes or no answers.

so what he said was,     /accompanied by facial expressions which emphasized but's and should,s which I will italicize and bold respectively.   and forgive me here, because if you knew how much new information comes at me each working day, you would know I cannot remember this conversations verbatim, but I can give you the essence:

alex:  "your question is:  is it okay to eat these potatoes?  well, yes..  I mean you ~could~  safely eat these potatoes if you wanted to..   and they would probably taste very good.   much better than any store bought potatoes


you wouldn't want to eat these potatoes.   unless you want to waste money..  these potatoes are too valuable..  they are certified potatoes.  guaranteed disease free and are specifically for planting."

and then he went on to gesture how you would want to cut these highly valuable, disease free,  delicious yielding, certified potatoes into smaller chunky parts, and make sure there were at least two eyes, and then how you would plant them in a single layer and...

and then I spotted another customer in line across the way, and I was like, "oh!  that makes perfect sense..   can you walk over here to this beautiful family, and say all of that   -what you just said,  one more time please"


and that beautiful happy family left with a couple pounds of seed potatoes...   and potatoes seemed to parade through my mind throughout the rest of the evening..

never in my entire life have I ever planted a potatoe...    that would be so cool!  to plant a potato..  remember the scense in martian...    remember the famous painting...   which artist was that?   -vague memories I will have to google later..

and then, as I do not have the yard space to garden..   I came to the realization that this desire to plant a potato will have to wait..

or will it?!?

LOOK!   you can grow potatoes in a fabric pot!!   I cant contain myself...

seasoned cashier; tyro farmer/gardener...