Tuesday, July 07, 2020

Dear Nancy Giles, from (me!) sandra lynn harrison kay

in response to your opinion piece aired on cbs sunday morning

let me say first, i understand your perspective comes from that of an adult black female.

and understand you have experienced racism.

my true life experiences just don't fit the current narrative, and i'm struggling to share

the current narrative in media, viewed in its extreme:

all blacks are innocent
all cops are brutal and racist
anyone who does not proactively post an all black lives matter sign,
 or take a knee when its demanded is racist.

i will not take a knee.

i will not post a sign.

i am not racist.

i am in the company everyday of noble law enforcement officers

and i myself, was ambushed, kidnapped at gunpoint, covered up and raped

by a black male, wearing a hoodie, when i was 17 years old

and weighed maybe 110 lbs.

i am 54 years old now, as i write this.

i saw the predator for under one second before i had the gun to my temple

and this black male predator wearing a hoodie, named by media after several kidnappings and rapes 
in the city of San Leandro, California
as the Lakeside Serial Rapist

-he was only seen by several of his victims for under one second

his picture was sketched by police
based on the testimonies of all of us victims

none of us ever meeting each other, or knowing each others names

and the composite drawing of this serial rapist
was posted around the east bay in California

black male, wearing a hoodie.

he ambushed, kidnapped at gunpoint and raped  -9 victims (?)
and my understanding is that a 10th victim was not just raped but murdered before the pattern broke
and this black male predator remained at large

did many women hold their purses closer
and cross the street if they saw a black male approaching during this crime wave

you bet they did!

justifiably so.


i was labeled victim #2

 victim #1, she committed suicide in the aftermath

no one knows her name

you would not know my name without me sharing this and putting it write here:

sandra lynn harrison kay

the names of the other victims have never been shared publicly
or with me, 

the nature of the hideous crime, kidnapping/rape
makes it so, based on respect and privacy for the victim(s)

this information is not shared.


may i share here Nancy Giles, that i know your name

i am familiar with the name Trayvon Martin

George Flloyd

the string of names belonging to black males

but until this, you did not know my name

white girl, 17 years old, 


ambushed, kidnapped at gunpoint, covered up, raped
by black male, Lakeside Serial Rapist

you are not familiar with not one of the names of this black male predator's victims

they are nameless and forgotten.

i will hear George Floyds name annually for years to come.

and the police officers, D.A., law enforcement who were so helpful, kind, professional

you do not know their names.

so, this current narrative in media

it doesnt fit my life experiences.

and i am very proud of the fact, that over the years, 

with Jesus, family, friends, and a whole lot of self help effort

i did not, do not,  project on to the whole population of blacks

the evil action of the few.

-good time here to share, that in addition to being
ambushed, kidnapped at gunpoint, covered up and raped by a black male wearing a hoodie

i was also in a bank when it was robbed

and had a gun pointed at me

-the bank was arm-robbed by two black males.

blacks have. do. will. commit crimes.

i have no doubt there are some blacks, as well as people of every race, 

that are unjustly arrested.

but there are those who are quite justly arrested also.

we need to balance the narrative.

my ambition is to 

interrupt any/all narratives that project on to whole populations
the evil/corrupt behaviors of the some

we are for good cops, and against corrupt ones.

we are for blacks who are law abiding, and against blacks who commit crimes

we are for peaceful protests and against riots/looting

we are for the safety of our citizens

and against predators

we need to return to a narrative which speaks to CONTENT OF INDIVIDUAL CHARACTER

and leave the 'black' lives or  'blue' uniform

out of the equation.

evil does not have a color; good does not have a race

each individual responsible for their behavior
each individual responsible to judge others based on CONTENT of CHARACTER

even blacks who are currently committing crimes
seem empowered by a 'racism' pass, and pay no consequence for their criminal behavior

and even noble police who are legitimately doing their job
are having their authority usurped by unjust 'racism' or 'brutality' labels

let's correct the falsely skewed narrative toward truth:

both exist

blacks who commit crimes and should be arrested/held accountable
blacks who don't

both exist

noble law enforcement officers who serve and protect
corrupt law enforcement who should be fired/held accountable

the goal:  do not demonize entire populations
or empower entire populations

but demonize criminal behavior
and empower noble behavior 

i want to close with sharing the work/lessons of 

Johanna Ray Vollhardt


use it to explain, why I am reluctant to feed the 'black' lives matter narrative

and briefly, before sharing her work, 

share, that when i was in middle school, there was good relations between whites/blacks

/not with whites/mexicans, but i will save that story

between blacks and whites it was good, until, the movie Roots came out.

now, how the movie landed on the hearts/minds of grown adults, i do not know

but how it landed on the immature, middle school minds of my black peers

i do know.

and suddenly i was under attack by blacks for the wrong doing hundreds of years ago by people i never even knew.      entirely innocent, and attacked.

the movie was counterproductive if the intention was evolution/equality

we went from united to divided.


i believe what Johanna Ray Vollhardt teaches is key

i sum it up here:

humans respond to aggression/violence/injustice in one of two ways:

1. altruistic/pro-social

2.  self-centered/anti-social.

and what DETERMINES which way given humans respond has to do with
whether they see injustice as 'shared' or 'unique' to them

if you see injustice as 'shared'
you respond altruistically/pro-social

you fight the injustice itself; not people

if you see the injustice as 'unique' to you/your group

you respond in a selfish/ anti-social manner

when we say 'black' lives matter, this feeds a 'unique to us' narrative

and we do see division, aggression, riots, racism rise

but, when you learn about the holocaust, genocides around the world;
gay rights, the women's right to vote, elderly rights, etc.  World War I, II

when you learn about violence against women
human trafficking

you realize you don't have the monopoly on injustice

you see that for all of time, across the globe

write now

there are oppressors/injustices/evil in many spheres

it is not unique to you/your group

freedom isnt free

and an ongoing effort by all good people

to fight evil forces

is part of our civic job and responsibility




after generation


Saturday, July 04, 2020

4th of July Bliss by (sexy! & tops!)

Wednesday, July 01, 2020

The Heart Seen... fresh and fun contributions

from squidmann & spike

great blessings surround!!

and the top one per his email:

sitting in the same home office for 17 years, looked up today to see this!

and I really appreciate those...   'was blind, but now I see' heart seen contributions


the bottom one, 

formed in the sand by the trickle of a tiny waterfall.


"thank you!"   I love them!!     xoxo  ~s.c.

Tuesday, June 30, 2020

beauty for ashes photos by (me!) sandra, tvgp

Isaiah 61

In Jesus Chain-breaker, Pain-Taker, Way-Maker Name...    hallelujah! & amen!



Isaiah 1:19 photo by (me!) ~tops. meal by (my sexy!)

as I am with words; he is with food.

prior to taking one bite, I say, 

"Thank you Jesus!  Thank you Robert!"

once a square of dirt and weeds photo by (me!) sandra, tvgp

I just can't get over how flowers can so dramatically transform what was once just a square of dirt and weeds.      -thriving!   new blooms, greeted by cosmos encore from last year..      amen that!

Bragging Writes... neighbors we love (Ysidor! & Mary!)

Christian Culture as prayed for by (me!) writeousmom

Thursday, June 25, 2020

with love, from niles (sexy! tops! sharon! rick!)

on a perfectly beautiful day..  

this gorgeous park, found only accidentally by my mom & rick recently, when they searched for parking.  
salami, cheese, grapes, crackers, chocolates,  my mom's famous ultimate fudge, water, spirits
and an entirely wonderful and over due visit.

/had to incorporate a railroad track in the indigenous word art.. seemed only fitting.

with love & gratitude


Monday, June 22, 2020

Happy Father's Day @ Vasona (sexy! & tops!)

special "thank you!" here to Gabriel for taking our 'indigenous art photo'

    we are grateful to everyone who has, does, and will agree to take our photo for us when we hand them our phone camera..   and we always say yes, or proactively offer to take pictures for others

but Gabriel went the extra mile without us ever asking..   she grabbed a cooler to stand on for a better angle, and figured out a way to adjust something on the phone so we were not entirely silhouetted out.

and we got to visit for a bit..    and i think we have inspired her to join in on the fun hobby of indigenous art too..

write on!  "cheers!" and encore that...   amen!


and of course, we said our "thank you" prayers, made calls, sent cards/gifts, etc. for the best dads in the world in our families...        we are blessed!


and we took a few pictures, I haven't posted here..  but that we treasure:

    to see caution tape around groups of the parks cement picnic tables and BBQ's.

and then to see families, friends, all picnicking on the grass that surrounded the empty, taped off table areas

the park was filled with walkers, hikers, bikers, families, friends..   everyone enjoying the fresh air, sunshine, gorgeous water, natural landscape, wildlife.    we saw a few people wearing masks, but it was the exception, not the rule.   -and there was honoring/respect for social distancing..  with each family/group separated by a distance from the next family/friend group   -but the families/friends themselves were hanging out like usual.

it was in every way, a blessed and beautiful day.    amen!

Sunday, June 21, 2020

i saw God on April 30th, 2020 (me!) sandra, AKA ~tops

it is entirely true!  I, Sandra Harrison Kay, AKA, WriteousMom, AKA, Sandra tvgp; SHE; that cute chick from Hayward; Sandy Cheeks;   AKA, many names,  most currently  ~tops, 

many names but one person:  (me!)

I saw God on April 30th, 2020.    And this opportunity is available to anyone else brave enough, spontaneous enough, bold enough, 

crazy in love enough

to drive the drive I   -unplannedly- took my sexy on.

         /this may prove a key ingredient   -the unplanned nature of it all


        /and, ignorance..     - knowing very little about what you are about to get yourself into


so, sorry to say, but by reading this...    you will know too much, and therefore cannot have the same experience

but, apply the same formula when a window appears to be opening in your own life, on your own unique journey, and you will get the same results...

you sure do have to pay attention to those windows starting to open...

don't just pass by...

when the man you love, sitting in the passenger seat, looks at you and says, 

"96 more miles..   sure you want to do this?!?"

and you arrive at the fork...               

when you arrive at the next fork, that is; as there appear to be many knives, several forks, and only a few spoons at the supper table of life..

anyway..   where you see a familiar short cut, 

vs an entirely new path

take the entirely new path! the one you've never been down before..

I mean up.  the one you've never been up before!

 -because it seems to me, from my memory, that UP was a very consistent direction I drove my limelight for miles and miles and miles on the day I saw God



no idea where I was heading really, but the road was so narrow, and the turns were so tight, all I could do was drive forward with my hands fixed in the 10 and 2 position

and my foot shifting: accelerator; break; break; accelerator...

break in; accelerate out...   slowly...    onward and upward...

I tried my best to keep conversation going with my sexy..   he seemed pretty calm, and seem to be enjoying the views..

"look!"    he'd say, 

and, I wanted to; I really did..   

but there were these cliffs..   and a tight turn, and the focus required to drive made it so that 

best I could do was   

well, if it were recorded; I would win the Guinness world record for fastest glance

my eyeballs moved to the view and back to the road in front of me in under one half, of one half of one second


truth is, I don't remember what we talked about, I don't remember any spectacular views..

not until we got to San Antonio Valley where the road flattened, and widened, and for miles and miles you could see beautiful trees, meadows, wildflowers, "look!  deer!"

and I could look!   whenever there were no curves, no cliffs and a wide road

I could look, admire, enjoy, talk to Robert, and drive so comfortably at the same time

I could do it all...

I love San Antonio Valley.    I really, 

REALLY wish it did not ever have to come to an end.

but it did.  and up, and around more tight corners, we went

my sexy joked, "they call this a two lane road?!?!   all they've done is take a one lane road and draw a line down the center"

thank God, with my nerves as close to being shot without actually being shot,  his demeanor empowered me to keep going

keep going, and going, and going...

because it turns out, once you arrive at a certain place, you realize, there is just no turning back.


you have no room on either side of your car to turn back if you wanted to

you will either crash into the side of a rocky mountain, or fall to your death off a cliff.

so, it is not a place of maybe this, or maybe that; it is only this: keep going.

I did consider putting it in park, and trading places.. Robert could drive, I would be the passenger

I know he would have done it.  he would.

but, I couldn't unpeel my hands from the steering wheel.


I never even mentioned it.  just kept going up...

for how long, I can't be sure, but, 

1/2 hour, 


hour and a half, 


we finally, finally, finally reached some 4,200 feet above sea level!

the bay area's highest point!

and I paused a moment to talk to God..

because, somehow, someway, the only time I had to move over for another car, or scoot to the side for a motorcyclist, or bicyclist..

well,  Jesus..  I never had to drive backwards..

the only time I had to navigate the presence of another automobile, is when the road widened, or was flat, like in San Antonio Valley

"Thank You!"

I couldn't have made it this far without you!  I know you are with me!   -us; all of us!  me, my sexy, our family, friends, everyone on this road...

all of humanity!   everything is so beautiful!   you are amazing!   life is amazing!  

and, Dear God, 

can you please help me get back  ~home.

    -because you know the lyrics as well as anyone...   "what goes up... must come down"

and, now, the drive from the Lick Observatory was the same as the drive to...   only instead of UP and AROUND..  

it was DOWN and AROUND...

forever it seemed.

   -and I did see God!  -just like I told you.   I saw God   -and it wasn't exactly at the highest peak, where you might have first imagined, 

or in the epic views my sexy got to enjoy

or the forest of trees; or the mountain itself; or the narrow paved road; or the wildflowers, or the meadows, or the range of wildlife  -birds, deer, rabbits

in the beauty of the perfect blue sky; or in the spring sunlight.. 

although God is present in ALL of those things.

I saw God during my ascension    -he appeared only very briefly, and if I remember correctly, 

only 2 or 3 times over the course of such a long, challenging, dangerous drive

and he's still there!

you can see him too!

   -the most beautiful sight along the scary, narrow, hairpin turns of your life:

Guardrails.     -just the sight of them!   those are the truest, most beautiful sights you will ever see on your journey of life.    God is love; God is Guardrail.       Amen!


on this same day..   we drove up Sierra, along the backroads from San Jose to Livermore.  And then on the way back  -Mines Road, in Livermore, the Mt Hamilton route back to San Jose.

Beautiful Scenery!    And more driving than I'm likely to do for the rest of my life.

In Jesus protective and trustworthy name!   hallelujah & amen.