Friday, May 27, 2016

"Cheers!" from Pier 29 in Alameda

.. got to enjoy sue regniers company two days in a row, and my mom sharing her pictures/stories from her recent visit to her home state of Ohio..

at the beautiful views all around restaurant pier 29 in Alameda..

with..  one guess.. what we had to drink, after the rave reviews from the prior day

-lemon drop martinis..!    -here they serve them in a different style glass, with rainbow sugar sprinkles around the glass rim..

delicious!  

and how fun would it be, we discussed, to make that one of our group activities:   compare and contrast lemon drop martinis throughout the bay area..  Yes..

"Cheers!".   & " thank you! Love you!". -best mom in the universe..   welcome home.. 

The Happy Room by... (Jill vellinger!)

-this is one of the best discoveries for me of 2016..

i had absolutely NO IDEA the room I've been renting from my sister for who keeps track of how many years..

the room, which was, prior to my needing/renting it, was my nieces room..

the room which I've always described as the happy room..

with its beautiful bright blue sky color painted walls above a colorful flower wall paper border, which is above a bright green base..   with let your light shine.. Painted over the window..  and a tree created/painted and attached to the wall itself..    -with a swing here, and a kite there..

well, all this time I've enjoyed it..  I never knew WHO designed it several, many years ago..  11?

and very recently, when my sister and Jill crossed paths in downtown pleasanton and then happened in at ricks picks at the same time..   my sister said, "that's who painted Sarah's room.."

and I was like.. "Jill Vellinger?!?..   I know and love her..."

and I don't think my sister realized, Jill is the same person who organized/created The Big Draw events in downtown, and! Is an interior designer recommended/affiliated with ricks picks..

and I just want you to know Jill...  LOVE what you did with the place..    darling and perfect for the baby my niece was at the time,

but you know what..   still wonderful for the 50 year old literary & mixed media artist auntie sandy..   in the cold and early dark of winter.. im still always surrounded by blue skies, sunbeams, and an evergreen tree!

i thought you might appreciate, as an artist and mom yourself, how..

well, when my niece was sent to her room sometimes, many years ago.. for time-outs..

in her frustration, she would peel the wallpaper border.. 

pick the flowers...

and take a look at THE HEART SEEN there!  -actually, there are SEVERAL heart shapes from her picking/pulling the wall paper..

and I wish it could stay exactly as it is write now..

forever!   I'd never touch it if it were left to (me!).   and despite being in this room for a number of years, surrounded by said torn wall paper..

it was only last year, or the year before that I noticed

The Heart Seen... "Look! Write there!...   and over there!  Oh my goodness, there's like a whole row..."

anyway..   its just beautiful Jill!   "Thank you!"

Jillvellingerdesigns.com

"..but it did!..." as experienced by (me!) sandra, tvgp

i know; i remember..   there were these magical moments last year, at Barones music under the stars events, where i was just certain

-when you combine the perfect climate, with our favorite band, pride & joy.. Live!  and the awesome dance company of our friends, Motown & Craig.. all the people we've come to know by face and dance moves.. the staff.. the delicious drinks.. the gorgeous trees and lighting.. the happy crowds..  dancing to our favorite songs..

i was just certain,  it doesn't get better than this

But I was wrong; because it got EVEN BETTER than all that at last nights opening..

take everything i just mentioned and add on:

add write on to the dance floor/stage itself BIG SCREENS which allowed us live-music-dance-starved, slash, authentic WARRIOR FANS to

-get this..

WATCH the game WHILE we DANCED!  and, all by itself, that is pretty awesome, because

ive been watching these games at home, with my sister on the couch, and me in a recliner in my pajamas..

so to be all dressed up, outside, with friends and a much larger crowd,  -dancing..  "..yes, its ladies night..oh what a night..what a night!"

and all cheering TOGETHER..  

well, i think it might just be the very reason "THEY WON!"

-and add on further.. our newest friend, sheila, who we met at main street brewery, and who loves live music, the bands, and dancing..

-dare i say, even more than I do! Sheila is another one of those fantastic people who will dance from the strum of the first song, to its past closing time,  -no alcohol or partner required, but nor turned down..     -easy to spot her even in the tremendous crowd.. because her favorite spot is write in front of the band..  

***

and now im equally certain.. it does not get better than that!

***

/which feels to me now, partially and practically, a way for God to say..   'oh yeah..  wait til you experience what else I can do'

***

and now I half expect Russell crowe to tap me on the

...  shoulder...

and ask me to dance sometime before the season ends.

"Thank you Jesus! ... and everyone mentioned..  and BRI, for transportation/sitting..    amen!"
-

Thursday, May 26, 2016

Jealousy. as interpreted by (me!) sandra, tvgp



I am quite restricted by time, to write what id like, but will get this out and on the digital/e-page:

1.  -of interest to me, that in The Secret Power of Speaking God's Word, Joyce Meyer's book..  the table of contents is alphabetized, but as we read, we can see it goes from I, to L.

skipping J.    and so, no direct passages/chapter on the topic of Jealousy.

***

this morning, on her Enjoying Everyday Life, program, she spoke on the topic.  in brief, she told a humorous story of being required/requested by God, to be very specific in her confession,   -not just say, sorry I have sinned.. kind of thing, but   -specific

and she confesses,  ".. I was jealous of one of my friends, I was jealous of the blessing my friend received.."

***

now,  -what remains a long fascination for me, is not jealousy itself, but rather, HOW WE INTERPRET/IDENTIFY/NAME that ...   internal feeling; experience.

it is very specific, isn't it.    not sad, or hurt, or ...  a myriad of other things.    -how is it that we

  -interpret, indentify and explain our  -feelings?   this feeling, of jealousy.

***

anyway, one quick true story on the topic, and how I will forever give myself the naivety award, because,

the memory this triggers, is when,  -during my Mag Time Frame days, when I was introducing my product to a panel of people in the industry

prior to attending the meeting, someone said to me,  "now.. you have to know that they are going to be jealous that they did not come up with this idea themselves.."

and true, true, true:   until that was said, directly to me, out loud   -I had not once even considered it.

I really, truly, thought, everyone would be happy, because I had created a product that would help sell millions of embellishments/supplies/tools, etc.   that were otherwise only restricted to scrapbooks.  I had created a new platform/foundation..   it was a win/win!

... but..    to say the industry, people thereof, were   -happy.  well, this certainly did not turn out to be the case.    too bad, really..

but go to school on me..     see, what I learned for you...

***

if Joyce were to add, a chapter on Jealousy..   I'm going to invest some time, in the near future, guessing which passages out of the bible she would guide us to

to help us overcome/tackle, rise above, this very specific and non-productive  feeling..

perhaps, its all under the topic of INSECURITY,  page 30:

***

in the dictionary:  jealous = resentment toward someone.     -again, how is it that we interpret resentment  -what synapses to what to = that feeling?   once we have the feeling/how is it, we interpret/identify?

it certainly seems to me, we need the basic foundation of this information before we can overcome it.

   -hold every thought captive!   examine it..     check it for truth...

***

now, I live/work in environments where I am literally surrounded by people who are materially/physically/financially blessed in ways I am not; and yet I have no resentments

very little, jealousy

and I credit entirely my spiritual walk.  my volunteer/free will surrender of my will to God.  and I have locked in my heart and mind, that if God wants me to have this or that; I will.  and if God does not; I wont..   and I fully trust God, so..  

and the same, I project that on to others...     -and its all so we can learn..

I will close with this:   I sure wish I could sing!   I say it all the time...   if I could sing...   there would be no shutting me up.  id be out singin' on a street corner somewhere write now!    -but I don't feel

it is not my interpretation that I feel jealous of people who can sing..    I admire it!  I think..   oh! how lucky that God blessed you that way!   and I listen; listen; listen..  love to listen to people who can sing

and the whole   -or at least, one of the big reasons I write like I do.   

is because I cant sing.       blessing in disguise...   keep your eyes and ears out, keep your mind and heart open,  - for these kinds of things..


In Jesus truthful name,   amen!

Sunday, May 22, 2016

"Yes. YES!" through the bedroom door. as heard by (me!) sandra, tvgp

.. now, i am not the type person who holds a glass up to a closed bedroom door; or peeps through cracks..  

but.  -i do admit to slowing my walk down and taking many small steps vs. my usual brisk walk by, and past.

mostly because..   well, my sister and i have built in codes about these kinds of things.  we were roommates, remember, for over 8 years before we each fell in love, got married, had children.

and then roommates again, after our divorces.  we don't even have to verbalize rules, policies or procedures..   we have by this time established entirely telepathic common courtesy practices; mutually established and agreed upon.

so, the ONLY reason i slowed my walk, was because,

well, I heard her say "Yes.". rather loudly..  through a small opening in her bedroom door.

and to my knowledge; she was alone.    and, sure we both do talk to ourselves/sometimes, but it was somehow distinct from that..

" YES!".   -she said it louder this time..

/hmmmm.

my mind calculated that her kids were both out of the house with family.. 

And, well...   maybe I was so quiet..  and my work schedule so non-predictable

Maybe she forgot I was even in the house.

"No.".  I heard her say.   -twice.  "No" and then "NO" again.

I smiled to myself.   We've all been there, haven't we..   -if only a little to the left, or write...  if only up over there, and not down..

so elusive sometimes..

"YES!".  I heard her say..   and I felt happy for both of them.  -ah,  he found it...    good job!

and then as i continued on my way to the kitchen, I heard her say

"MAKE A PAYMENT".   and then,  " STATEMENT AMOUNT"

and have been laughing ever since.  

***

... someone found a way to make cell phone bill paying exciting didn't they... 

"Cheers!" .. from paradisosanleandro.com

public "thank you!" to sue regnier!  very beloved and long time family friend.. 

for spoiling me with her delightful company and a belated happy 50th birthday lunch.

in one word:   spectacular.

she introduced me to my first /but definitley not my last!
lemon drop martini... 

and when i order one again, at a different time and place.. she explained i should not probably hold it to this perfect standard.  So!

my first lemon drop martini happen to taste the best they are capable of tasting!  

and we shared a...  some beautiful in presentation, and perfect in texture/temperature/flavor ratio: crab/avacado appetiser..

-devoured it.

and she had her very first lamb burger...   which she loved; save only that next time she would order it med/rare vs. med...

i thoroughly enjoyed my fettucini/smoked salmon...

but honey, we did not stop there.  

we each boxed half of our main meals to save room for...

chocolate molten cake!   and coffee...

sat next to the window, -of course..   took in the fantastic and inspiring view of the residential architecture..   each home so unique in character and design from its neighbor..

-polar opposite of the track/uniform housing where i currently rent a room..

and, quite wonderful, the art inside the restaurant itself..  several large canvases of trees/forest scenes..  

great visit too..  catching up on life..  mutual friends/family.. milestones of weddings/careers/set backs and victories..

"I love & Thank you!" so much for this great time! at this great place..

I have officially decided to have more birthdays...  more often..

in fact,  august 13th.. is my 50 1/2...    

In Jesus loves fellowship, breaking bread and lemon drop martinis name...  amen!

Saturday, May 21, 2016

The Hearts Seen.. by (lee ann caldwell!)

.. even more from Carmel..  God loves when people visit the beach..  -see!   She has a bouquet of wild heart rocks..  Beautiful! Xoxo

The Hearts Seen... by (lee ann caldwell!). Carmel beach...

this is such a good sign... !  and wonderful photograph! "Thank You!". Xoxo

Friday, May 20, 2016

SPEAKING of being POPULAR WITH OLDER MEN.. that reminds (me!), sandra, tvgp

original post titled HE THOUGHT ~ SHE THOUGHT written in 2008.   trigger/cerebral hyperlink for re-post this morning, is in the current title.


***

i've so much i want to say and write about the poetry, prose & art festival, but first i must tell you about THE NIGHT BEFORE THE FESTIVAL.. (that would have made a better title, huh.. anyway..),

went down like this: i had just finished hanging signs and putting up displays here n' there for the festival and it was time to go home. i was tired. very tired. but on my way through the parking lot to my car i was approached by one of the elderly men from the senior center

"i have an extra ticket to see the music man tonight, wanna be my date?" he asked (and quite innocently, i might add)

thoughts raced through my mind... the kids are with their dad tonight... i'm available.. it's friday night.. i love the theatre.. it's more fun to go places with people than alone... there's no reason not to go really... i can rally for the cause.. i should say


"yes!"


and next thing you know i'm on the wheels bus with 25 seniors, sitting next to my new friend ron, on our way to the bankhead theatre (where i just performed a week ago) to see the music man, presented by the pleasanton playhouse

and in retelling this story to my workshop leader, martha alderson and classmates at the poetry, prose n' art festival, this is the part where everyone went like,

"oh, how sweet.. how nice of you"

"BUT NO! ..." i warned them, 'cuz guess what...

here i was thinkin' i was just good company.. maybe like a surrogate granddaughter or something.. or maybe (at age 42) a surrogate daughter

but ron was seein' things a whole different way.

when he said, "date" -he meant DATE.

and i want you to know i had to bat that man's hands off my shoulder, then my leg!

he was no innocent elderly senior citizen in need of company... he was a four-handed flirty non-stop frisky type disguised in a mr. rogers sweater!

a couple other seniors on the bus were laughing... "how do you do it ron? go out to your car for a sweater and bring back a date?"

"i have my secrets," he smiled back, trying to hold my hand.


~what have i gotten myself into?~


i tried engaging ron in conversation to distract him from the thoughts that came more naturally

i learned he'd worked in the lumber yards for many years; was from canada originally, had seven children,

learned about how he'd prayed to the lord in his early twenties to be freed from alcoholism, and it worked. learned his wife of many years had been sick for some time and was recently moved into a nursing home in livermore.

and while we were en route he pointed out the window to a middle aged man in a plaid shirt walking with a bit of a stumble

"that's my son," he said, "can't stop drinking" -and he went on to share that his son had recently been released from jail

and my thoughts then went to my maternal grandma (my mom-ma) who passed in april a number of years ago -what a conversation with her might be like, if you were sitting next to her on the greyhound bus (she refused to fly and didn't like trains). six children.. two of her boys alcoholics, in and out of jail their whole adult lives..

" i think the advances they're making in neuroscience are gonna help alcoholics one day... within the next ten years," i said. and ron gave me the same look everyone does when i say that..

overwhelming doubt.

every opportunity he could, ron would put his arms around my waist... to help me out of my seat, to help me off the bus, to help me to my seat...

and every opportunity i could, i removed his hands from my body.

the performance was outstanding. the props were magnificent, the lighting fantastic, the cast excellent, the singing, the orchestra... the story...

"i paid a lot of money for that ticket," ron told me, "i'm glad it didn't have to go to waste"

"it's not going to waste with me," i assured him, "i love the theatre. thank you for inviting me"

and then he took that opportunity to invite me on a cruise in florida -for a week!

"i'm not going on any dates until my kids are in college," i told him, as i placed his hands back on his own lap.

and i mixed n' mingled with the other seniors, 80% women, during the intermission and after the show on our way back to pleasanton. -none of them quite sure what to make of me

(and i was acutely aware if i did not get my hair painted every 3 weeks, i would have blended write in.)

"i'm writing my first play write now," i told them, "for the firehouse art center.. when it opens a couple years from now. i hope you'll come"

and i promised ron a free ticket to my first play as a thank you. -got his address/contact info-

threw him my "and that's all you're gettin'" look. -gave him a quick hug and said good-bye.

but i've got in my head that i'll send ron two free tickets, -just to see who else falls for that mr. roger's sweater trick that worked on me.

i spy my lucky number... "Cheers!"

Thursday, May 19, 2016

make that 4 things.. suggests (me!) sandra, tvgp

from a talk I gave at Pleasanton Middle School..  I recommended each student have three things before heading to high school

1.  a lucky number

2. a favorite quote

3. your word..  that one word that captures your essence


we know mine:  213, /which you can I spy in the picture here today;  "BE the change you wish to see in the world" & "you cant use up creativity, the more you use, the more you have.."    /same can be said of love; yes..    and, VERVE.   /but if Russell crowe is anywhere in earshot, let's make that verve~vacious.

k,

but you know what else you should have:  a bible passage. I'm not using the word favorite here; or most beautiful..      but more like,  -the passage that you most deeply spiritually connect with, and/or that is divinely inspired..

mine is Isaiah 54.   it is not my favorite.  it is not the most beautiful, to me..   it is not the most important..   but it has been   -gifted to me.   and I re-read it with some regularity

it is also one of those passages I "happened" across, when randomly opening the bible, closing my eyes, and pointing a finger...     and, look here, Isiah 54:  12-13...   




and my personal interest is much more in the new testament, but this is my passage.   "Thank You!" Jesus and Isaiah...      "... think I finally found my hallelujah!....."



Wednesday, May 18, 2016

Tulip. photography & a poem by (me!) sandra, tvgp

i lie to rest here

the idea, that tulips,

are in bloom

when they stand straight up

in straight lines

all in a row and very uniform; save color.

it is a beautiful sight no doubt.  miracles on a stem, each and every

but the tulip is not truly in bloom

until it begins to take

its very own shape.

learn its own dance.

until it moves in space to its own music,

gravity and destiny.

until it sheds the unnecessary.

and reaches up, and out, and down

and in every direction

with gratitude for its being

ALIVE


the tulip




is most beautiful

not write after it breaks through the soil

but because it broke through;

not as it opens

but because it opens

not when looking all alike


 the tulip

is most beautiful

when it looks only like itself

in the company

of liked others.


each becoming and fulfilling a living, breathing, colorful sculpture of nature and times design



 what shape will each tulip take?


you cannot know.

only

enjoy.


and understand

that you,

you uniform human; save color

you are a tulip

too.




 on your way

to


becoming someone

unique


lovely


intriguing


and


colorful and kind.
    if you let it.

it happens on its own.

quite naturally.

every little tulip already knows how to bloom.


 

Obvious. (Me!) sandra, tvgp

/cant remember which filter I chose..  Latte?   anyway..   as a carefree brunette, there were occasions like,  "honey. I'm flattered to be sure, but I'm old enough to be your mother.."

and now, with my gray, it appears my popularity is growing with older men.  I think this is because they see me as obviously in their age bracket; they don't have to guess...

and at the risk of this being received different from the way

I mean it

Men are somehow both obviously blind and blindly obvious at the same time.

not ALL men, of course..

/just...   99%.     

-she says with a smile..