SHEsaysWITHaSMILE.blogspot.com
Friday, January 26, 2018
this is
only for people interested in human memory storage
triggers/cerebral hyperlinks
NOW CLOSED
My Bank Robbery Cerebral Hyperlink
If you have any interest, it is HERE
but I will not be re-telling it verbally
even when it is germane to the conversation and perfectly acceptable to do so
-I'm just plain tired of it
I feel taxed by the energy I know will be required to tell it, before I even say the first word
each time this commercial plays, I consciously override, and do not open (click on) the cerebral hyperlink that does exist in my brain.
when Robert had a football play-off party
and this, very entertaining, very well edited, southwest commercial comes on
anyone who has a cerebral hyperlink in their brains to a bank-robbery related personal experience will automatically share their story
and two or three people did
and of course, the purple dye..
it is a cerebral hyperlink to my bank robbery experience
and I could have jumped in and shared my experience
but, I looked around the room,
I knew, someone else, with a different personality could hold court with this story, and fascinate everyone in the room
but, the commercials would be over soon, and people would want to watch the game
I didn't want to race-tell the story
also,
there would no doubt be questions
and I didn't have the energy to tell the whole experience
so I decided not to mention it -at all.
but,
the bank robbery itself
means very little to me
what means a lot to me!
the capturing of the memories by THREE of us! each there.. but, from a different perspective
and raw, unedited; not polished writing; authentic
it is one of the greatest treasures in my entire blog
because of how the platform of a blogosphere
allowed me to share my memories,
and then, much later, sue-sue to share hers..
and then much later
steve shaw to share his!
it is a living document
if anyone else who was there wanted to.. they could add on at will /with my authorization.
****
and it allows us -(me!) to see how human memory, does, and does not work
***
that brings me to another experience that happen during the football playoff party Robert hosted
at some point.. Jon Gruden, being also everywhere in the news write now
-well,
Robert's friend John said something about Jon Gruden's -son-
-son???-
I did not say out loud, but struggled to remember..
I thought he had all girls.
here's why..
because,
1. jon gruden's child (children) went to the same pre-school briefly, that my children went to
Sonshine Pre-School in Pleasanton
I crossed paths with him.. a few times/in passing only
and then he, his family, left for Florida
2. someone, who apparently is not Jon Gruden -but who I locked in my mind as being very male, and sports/athletic professional
-someone at the pre-school had all girls..
and I remember wondering, -for such a sports guy..
did he wish he had at least one son? or would he coach his girls, and involve them, as they got older
we are going back, some.. 17+ years...
I just remember.. pondering/considering
how that happens in life
the sports-fanatic dad, will end up with all girls
the beauty pageant mom, with all boys
anyway..
I would have lost money by betting on my own memory
and was glad I didn't say out loud
"no, jon has all girls.."
because when I looked it up.. sons.
and, then, with that memory all off,
was it jon gruden?
am I confusing?
let's call it a memory check-up
but, i'll ask Carla.. if it was during jack's time there, and not taryns.. might find out..
and I appreciate again, yet again
how this blog has served as my memory storage
because, if I document it
and it is not compromised by anyone
it is far more accurate than I am on my own
and can store much more information
that can actually be pretty quickly accessed.
"to the blogosphere! cheers! and thank you! and amen!"
***
Thursday, January 25, 2018
So Sorry Russell.. from (me!) sandra, tvgp
you know how I like my day~dreams
/hot and sunny side up
and my first year at alden lane.. I wont tell how many times, while I was ringin' this up, or packin' plants in boxes, I would imagine him
my Russell Crowe..
just randomly showing up at alden lane to surprise (me!). I won't go into details, but
it put a smile on my face,
and, several occasions I returned from my power-nap-lunches, and my co-worker friend Daniel would say, "dreamin' about Russell again?"
"what gives it away..."
anyway,
I had the great pleasure of telling Daniel.. " now! instead of my imaginary encounters with Russell Crowe.. I have a very real Robert!"
and, so, just yesterday, -that was my day~dream:
"so sorry Russell.. you're too late. you missed your window of opportunity..."
and it re-flashed in my mind: how, long ago, that one time, I searched the internet and saw a picture of his former wife
so sensational looking! plus enormously talented..
and I have my fair share of delusions, to be sure, but being on that scale is not one of them..
but playfully, what could I say.. to someone like Russell Crowe, that could make me sound even remotely worth a glance?....
~and that's when I came up with my new word:
"Verve~vacious!"
Do you have your word yet?
Your lucky number?
Your favorite quote?
***
A favorite plant?
I had a fresh opportunity myself, unpacking plants and pricing very recently to behold again, my personal favorite: I just think this plant.. it is the most beautiful houseplant ive ever seen! and while I was in Ruthie's Room, I had the great pleasure of first hand witnessing how it was a show-stopper for other customers too
and close by giving a public "thank you!" to google
for reminding me:
"Happy Birthday Virginia Woolf!"
In Jesus', is in my living stream of consciousness, name... amen!
Wednesday, January 24, 2018
Miraculous Recovery a prayer/testimony by (me!) sandra, tvgp
as is true with any long time, good and true friend/family member... you develop short-cuts between each other, ways of communicating large amounts of information/emotion with just a few words, or even no words, by mere glance
and I pray using these short forms of communication which I will share with you.
so, in my prayer, when I pray, a miraculous recovery for.. [so n so people]
what I am saying, in its longer, /but still shorter, form is this
Dear Jesus, for this mother/daughter I have learned about -I am praying a miraculous recovery
the likes I have witnessed myself between my dad, and my brother
I am witness!
and anytime I learn of a broken relationship, especially between family members.. I provide this testimony
do not give up hope for things to turn around. do not give up hope.
with my dad, and my brother.. I have to go back lots of years, but the dates/times do not so much matter
what does matter
is that for a large number of years, many years ago, they became estranged from one another; the relationship was broken; very
to the point, that when my dad had triple bypass surgery, I remember being on the phone with my brother, -pleading really..
figure it out, talk to him.. call him, do something.. my God he is in the hospital..
but even under those circumstances, the hurt was too deep for a re-connection of any kind.
and I confess here.. I did give up hope.
that pain must be very deep...
and now, -fast forward how many years?! I don't know..
but eventually they did re-communicate.. they talked... they forgave..
and not only did they patch up their father/son relationship, but they went to Alaska together..
to Ireland together
and as I write this, they talk more to each other -daily!
than my sister and I talk to our dad -which averages weekly.
it is so beautiful! so wonderful to see how they are today vs. a long number of years ago
I think they serve as powerful testimony for anyone estranged from a family member write now...
miraculous repairs can, and do happen. I am a direct witness!
and I have learned of a few very sad estrangements between family members lately with personal friends/aquaintenances... and I know they exist globally, have and always will..
but that is my prayer, for the names of people I am holding directly in my heart, when I prayed this morning to Jesus
I need only say, a miraculous recovery for... and then I actually have a longer prayer, but which is just accumulated short-cut prayers..
and then I let it go..
cast all my cares..
this is the day the Lord has made... and I go re-joyce in it
hallelujah & amen.
Tuesday, January 23, 2018
Savanna Jazz/Chasing Trane
and, I've already gone on about Robert, -but let's add on,
he has a pretty awesome circle of long time, true friends
and, it was extra fun for me, to see
when we sat down at our table, at savanna jazz in san carlos
well, you know how I feed on documentaries
I had seen chasing trane on Netflix
and upon learning we would be going to savanna jazz
I watched it a 2nd time
and look write above my left shoulder
a picture of the creative genius himself
and how wonderful, this venue
and the live performances in this intimate setting
my personal favorite: ann mack singin' the I need a man with energy song..
/and happy to report ive been blessed with one, she says with a smile
"thank you!" across the board
fantastic evening!
hallelujah & amen /in the jazz genre..
Saturday, January 20, 2018
FUEL for the FAITHFUL by (me!) sandra, tvgp
payday Friday.. that's when I can fill up my tank vs. stick $20 in..and that's exactly what I was doin' at the arco on the corner.
gentleman at the pump across from me: is that a real tattoo on your face?
(me!): yes, it is..
gentleman: what does it mean?
(me!): conquer the world with kindness
gentleman: are you Buddhist?
(me!): Christian. You?
gentleman: Buddhist. and That's sounds more like a Buddhist thing.
(me!): Well, I walk in the fruits of the spirit.. and that's for everyone. All of humanity..
gentleman: everyone..
(me!): have a great weekend
gentleman: you too.
***
cerebral hyperlink to: Never met a former Buddhist
In Jesus, LOVE your God, LOVE your neighbor, Walk in LOVE, LOVE, LOVE's name. amen.
Friday, January 19, 2018
every page! ~aperitif for (me!) sandra, tvgp
and so it happened,
that in the early morning of January 19, twenty eighteen
I turned, slowly, each page, savoring the last paragraphs;
noting the seasoning of each word while delighting in the combined flavor of his sentences
and as it sometimes happens for many of us
distracted by lively conversation, I was unaware
at what pace I was sipping,
unaware of how many finger-food reaches, fork-fulls
pace yourself, save room for the meal...
but, when I looked down at our plate
when I glanced at my glass
empty; both.
and so, I cancelled the main meal
because I filled up on appetizers
but!
I somehow saved room for dessert.
and that became then, my new habit; because I learned -that's the best part
anything less,
anything more,
not enough, too much; respectively.
but,
appetizers, spirits and dessert.
and that is my book review:
each page was like... so delicious, so stimulating
I paced myself, small bites, conservative sips
and next thing you know, I was happy and full!
~the perfect meal.
***
Thursday, January 18, 2018
"Sandra, How Can I Find A Robert?" asks (darby!)
don't you know, I smiled so big when she asked me. Who can blame? And I rather wish and pray, every woman can and will find their very own Robertbecause this one:
he's taken!
and I can hardly believe it myself.. let's review: Christian. Single. Devoted Father to two beautiful young adult children. Excellent Work Ethic/Noble Service; Great Dancer, Phenomenal Cook, Animated and very fun sports fan, Gift of Hospitality, Wonderful circle of Friends.. Romantic, thoughtful..
who wouldn't want a Robert.
and let me tell you.. the first time I saw him with his shirt off.. I prayed immediately!
"Jesus! I'm so confused.. so confused..
put no confidence in outward appearances..
put no confidence in outward appearances..."
and I looked.. and, was like.. WOW! what a heart this man has..
and then, I asked Jesus to turn up the heat.. because, "boy.. it is pretty hot out isn't it..." I said with a smile..
"definitely too hot for you to put that shirt back on..."
and, so..
I have no idea really, save only Jesus -God's favor clearly! that I should be so blessed, so lucky
-show up at work with a week's worth of delicious lunches he has prepared for me.
getting to say goodbye to peanut butter sandwiches
and then,
dance together on Saturday nights at the best clubs..
and wake-up sunday mornings in those, tan, sculpted, gorgeous, strong arms..
I will put no confidence... but I will put my body write about here..
"clearly, I am in receipt, of not only God's favor, but some kind of bonus package.."
whatever I have done Jesus to deserve.. please help me keep doing it..
***
I was single for a good long time and not even looking! once you achieve the level of peace, joy, happiness.. once you have worked quite hard for it; accidentally jeopardized it entering into relationships with the wrong one /or two, or fifteen,
you start to protect it with a great deal more consciousness.
but in my prayers, I stayed open. "if - you- want a man in my life, Jesus..
well, you are going to have to practically place him in my lap, because I do not trust myself looking.."
and then quite a sequence of events, quite a number of planets had to align:
-he had to have recently ended a relationship, -which created an incentive to go out dancing..
-he had to go dancing, -specifically at barones in Pleasanton
-on a night I was there (chances high) -but! on a night I went to the bar after dancing ended (chances: very, very low.. as I have only done that 1 time; and only because mary re was there and guided..)
and so, blessed mary, we call her..
and then.. other planets.. my sister's surgery date rescheduled, which resulted in us having four very romantic sundays together before I would leave for three weeks..
there's more. but, trust (me!) -I am very grateful, very happy, very much in love.
***
Robert says: he planned on just dating and not getting involved with any one woman.. and, that he thought all women he would be dating would be pretty much about the same..
no one special; no one different..
and that, but then I came along, and changed his mind.
/and now, we all know, caution tape should be placed around men's mouths; -write
because they figure out pretty early how to say all the things you want to hear..
but,
I argued with my ego, and my heart..
who doesn't want to hear they are special, different from all the rest.. ego is an easy target..
but there was something about how it felt when he held my hand
and how he looked at me
and how each meal tasted
and how he confused me when his shirt was off
and how he danced
and how he kissed
how comfortable I was made to feel..
how he told me I was at the top.. knocked everyone else off the ladder.. and gifted me with the term of endearment, and! even had a stocking in his house he created with "tops" on it
I can't even describe it as a slow surrender..
because pretty quickly I moved away from doubt, and went write into, "Thank You Jesus!"
and "There is a God!" and, "Honey, I am being highly favored!"
***
and now here is the thing -for anyone, like darby, who wants to meet their own Robert
1. I had absolutely -no!- idea, the week before I met Robert, -that I ever would meet Robert. Total, utter, complete and very pleasant SURPRISE
2. I have casually, in conversation, listened to a million, 'how they met' stories, and I have formally, written featured articles, where I learn/share/write about the same information..
it can happen a million different ways, for a million different people, and you never know when.
but the common denominator: an open heart.
***
so, we each had an open heart,
we each liked to dance,
and, in a love letter Robert wrote to me, in response to a love letter I had written him:
We both love Christ.
We both love life.
We both love each other.
***
can I hear a hallelujah & amen!
A & Q for (me!) sandra, tvgp
I am less curious, but no less awed, by our physical bodies: veins, arteries, bones, muscle..
I am enormously curious about instincts, intuition, -the heart, the mind, innate gifts and talents
having mentioned before.. myself, walking past a plant numerous times, and seeing only a plant
and another human being walking past the same plant: "tequila!"
this list of innate instincts, gifts/talents, inclinations.. and how they are distributed among humanity
how we identify them.. how early?
and to consider: prayer.
an innate instinct.. how intuitively;
at such a young age..
even without education, or exposure, in many cases
humans will pray.
and I'm curious about this too: the logistical/anatomical distinction here:
intuition belonging to the human spiritual heart
instinct to the mind.
without looking it up just yet..
instinct -for me, -something inborn: like, I experience writing as an instinct; a very strong instinct in me, but I would further say, my writing instinct is also quite specifically creative non-fiction; a documentarian/reporter of everyday life
that is my instinct.
intuition then, it is by intuition, I choose one topic over another..
intuitively, I know: skip this, write that..
now I will look them up:
instinct: an inborn pattern of activity or tendency to action common to a given biological species.
intuition: direct perception of truth, fact, independent of any reasoning process, immediate apprehension.
the dictionary does not associate one with heart, one with mind
but the Bible does..
amen.
Tuesday, January 16, 2018
Question... from (me!) sandra, tvgp
will read more when time allows.. but,
was she married to two different men at the same time? for the same amount of time?
and, looks like a 4 year pattern..
Posts in Waiting: for (me!) sandra, tvgp
we have the miraculous Viking victory..
Warriors victory
a poem, titled, the sentient of my being
another love poem inspired by Robert
a post inspired by darby: how can I find a Robert...
more about music/lyrics
detailed morning prayer..
and others.. but must get to work.
amen.
hall
Saturday, January 13, 2018
ALL PEOPLE MAKE MISTAKES including (me!) sandra, tvgp
just think so much, about charlie
and none of us,
none of us can have opinions, make decisions, discern, judge, consider
based on information we do not have; or know
we can only, each of us -only operate with the knowledge we have at any given time
and that knowledge can grow..
information can change
and, so.. we all make mistakes, don't we.
I made a mistake, thinking Charlie was a better man behind the -seens, than he actually was.
and Charlie made a few mistakes too, didn't he.
and so,
this is why I refer to forgiveness as phD spirituality
it does not come naturally, or easily, or quickly, or innately, or instinctively
so, when you do forgive yourself, forgive others
/ and remember, forgive does not = condone
that is an accomplishment worth grand celebration.
amen.
A Proposal to Howard Schultz.. from (me!) sandra, tvgp #warriors @writeousmom
and so yesterday, popped in a local starbucks -and here we go again, with the marketing of the blondesremember the brew crawl?
anyway, having seen the interview of howard schultz by
ive always been a fan. a grateful fan. he was employing people, offering fair wages and providing health benefits to part-time employees when we needed it the most;
when unemployment was skyrocketing, and benefits were hard to come by, crazy expensive even for full time employees
when a number of companies were employing only part-time employees, and not even offering full time positions exactly so they could avoid providing health benefits
so -he seemed like a hero to (me!). /but so did
but, let me speak as if..
and get more importantly just to the point; my proposal: and ive slipped these photos in here in hopes you might notice
no blonds. but can you make out what my custom designed t-shirt reads? on the back, I have my website: WriteousMom.com, and on the front!
proverbs 16:31.
gray hair is a crown of splendor. it is attainted in the way of /writeousness
***
now, good God, I am not unaware, as an entrepreneur and consumer myself, living in the 21st century
as a poet, and appreciator of the power of words
I am not unaware that calling a beverage, like gray-haired lady, might dampen sales figures
but!
as I mentioned before.. even the apostles were masters of the euphemism..
so, we have two possibilities here for honoring my demographic.. who do,
well, I am without a power point presentation, or any actual fact-checked numbers,
but, i'm pretty confident [there's two wonderful adjectives for beverages..] that we,
women and men 50+.. let me be more inclusive and not gender specific and say, people..
people 50+ /while that category still exists.. because with artificial intelligence and augmented reality, I believe even 'people' has an expiration date..
anyway, people over 50:
we spend time and money at starbucks on ourselves, friends, children, spouses, siblings..
and even, literally! on our friend's children's spouses siblings! we are generous gift-givers
I see it all the time.
anyway,
here we go: two drink name possibilities:
1. the crown.
2. splendor
and, now, the same way a % people rush to judge and criticize starbucks..
I can already hear the nay-sayers because I am referencing the Bible, but!
I mean, I am a Christian, with American values, who whole-heartedly supports freedom of religion;
these are secular-friendly words, are they not: Crown. Splendor.
it would be like, attractive to the general public -and, at the same time! appreciated, in an insiders way, by Bible literate people over 50
/although, I must say.. even pastors/ministers, and long, long time church goers, and bible study leaders have to ask me, what is proverbs 16:31?
"only the entire middle row of your church people! and I blend write in.."
anyway,
I see how you appreciate and use, a couple, two or three adjectives to describe each drink, once you have come up with the name it is ordered by
so, how fun! ive been thinkin' on this for a whole day now, wonderful attributes/qualities/euphemisms/adjectives that describe people over 50..
people who have 5 decades + worth of experience here on the planet... "that's it!"
the crown: experienced,
and you can't live 50+ years without facing and overcoming a large number of... "that's it!"
the crown: experienced, confident, writeous & sexy /jumped ahead, and will go unexplained.. because we must keep moving...
and, now
splendor:
/isn't this so exciting.. the way these words sound, roll off the tongue, fill the air space in the coffee shop
"that's it!"
splendor: magnificent and exciting
let's practice and imagine together, shall we:
"yes, I would like my crown.. {and then the royal crown! with the works.. of course}
"give me a double-shot of splendor...
"i'd like to gift a crown to...
and then, barista to customer, " [ "name.. your crown is ready, or.. come and get your crown.. you've earned it..]
"you deserve a crown... ...lead the way...
"starbuck's splendor awaits...
****
yes, so that is my first proposal.
but, anyone who knows and reads me, knows!
-there's more where that came from
so, my second proposal
to somehow marry...
I mean it is perfect! /wait, let's add that word too.. it is one of my favorite, favorite
but, if you use the word perfect. -well, it's going to need its very own, new drink name..
you don't want to use it as an add-on, know what I mean,
you wouldn't say, for example, experienced, fun and sexy and perfect..
if something is perfect, that is the one and only word you use
{drink name}, perfect.
or, maybe, that could be the drink name itself, yes!
"make it perfect" "I want mine perfect" "[name.] perfection for you...
but, back to proposal number two..
dear howard schultz, my hero, hire-er of masses of people, -giver-er of health benefits to part time employees, care-er of not just numbers and sales, but people,
if we could somehow marry, the heart seen + starbucks
I mean,
the heart seen collection, is awesome and growing and can be see all around the world, it is fun, inspiring, -feeds the soul
just like starbucks!
so, in my mind, on the walls of starbucks everywhere.. heart seen photographs, from customers all around the world!
and, now, I remind here, that to be a true heart seen photograph; to qualify.. to meet the criteria
it has to be heart shapes found/photographed in our day to day environment, but which are not created with human intention.
I have 100's we can start with...
and now, they come in pretty quick, once people catch on.. so, it is also my idea, that
instead of print pictures, -putting them up, taking them down, changing them..
"digital!" -digital wall art, with heart seen photograph slide-shows, and! a way
an app! a way people can add them/incorporate write from their phones!
love all around!
wherever there is a starbucks... the heart seen...
what a great...
so,
dear howard Schultz,
"will you marry..
starbucks + heart seen?"
match made in heaven... oh! heavenly, what a great marketing adjective that is...
how 'bout, these drink names:
the glory, glory, hallelujah,
and the amen.
Thursday, January 11, 2018
STILL POPULAR WITH OLDER MEN (me!) sandra, tvgp
SPEAKING of being POPULAR WITH OLDER MEN.. that reminds (me!), sandra, tvgp
original post titled HE THOUGHT ~ SHE THOUGHT written in 2008. trigger/cerebral hyperlink for re-post this morning, is in the current title.
***
i've so much i want to say and write about the poetry, prose & art festival, but first i must tell you about THE NIGHT BEFORE THE FESTIVAL.. (that would have made a better title, huh.. anyway..),
***
i've so much i want to say and write about the poetry, prose & art festival, but first i must tell you about THE NIGHT BEFORE THE FESTIVAL.. (that would have made a better title, huh.. anyway..),
went down like this: i had just finished hanging signs and putting up displays here n' there for the festival and it was time to go home. i was tired. very tired. but on my way through the parking lot to my car i was approached by one of the elderly men from the senior center
"yes!"
and next thing you know i'm on the wheels bus with 25 seniors, sitting next to my new friend ron, on our way to the bankhead theatre (where i just performed a week ago) to see the music man, presented by the pleasanton playhouse
here i was thinkin' i was just good company.. maybe like a surrogate granddaughter or something.. or maybe (at age 42) a surrogate daughter
but ron was seein' things a whole different way.
when he said, "date" -he meant DATE.
~what have i gotten myself into?~
i tried engaging ron in conversation to distract him from the thoughts that came more naturally
i learned he'd worked in the lumber yards for many years; was from canada originally, had seven children,
and while we were en route he pointed out the window to a middle aged man in a plaid shirt walking with a bit of a stumble
and my thoughts then went to my maternal grandma (my mom-ma) who passed in april a number of years ago -what a conversation with her might be like, if you were sitting next to her on the greyhound bus (she refused to fly and didn't like trains). six children.. two of her boys alcoholics, in and out of jail their whole adult lives..