a first for both of us (mayor matt mahan!) and (me!) sandra harrison kay
yes, quoted quote worth repeating write about now:
garth brooks "john f kennedy who once said,
if more politicians knew poetry,
and more poets knew politics,
i'm convinced the world would be a little better place. "
it was mayor matt mahan's very first state of the city address as mayor
and it was my, very first time, ever attending a state of the city address (robert too..)
***
i never went to hayward's, or kept track of who the mayor even was.. ditto for san leandro, san lorenzo, -but paid some attention in pleasanton (where i was the poet laureate 2013-2015), without attending a state of the city..
my high dive jump into the cold and polluted ocean waters of politics really starts here:
NOTonNOBLE
***
skipping lots to get here: our drive to the city of san jose college campus where mahan's event was held
-the (graffiti is way too soft a word);
-the ugly, disturbing, gross, highly visible vandalism that has taken over the sound walls along 680S en route to the city of san jose campus.. -does anything degrade a city faster?
HIDEOUS. and growing exponentially in size and amount.. both sides of the freeway, for miles..
this exponential growth of destruction of public property, this vandalism, and degradation of our city screams the following:
criminals feel empowered -no one is getting caught.
laws are not being enforced. -no one is cleaning it up.
**
my husband and i have witnessed (in portland oregon) what it looks like, when a city, state, community just utterly gives up. the criminals [vandals, drug dealers, thieves, addicts, etc] have literally won and own (for free, by the way; ownership comes via intimidation) -but these criminals own certain territories -no healthy people, businesses, schools, libraries, stores of any kind exist where criminals have won, -healthy people have all left for safety reasons; businesses have left.. buildings are boarded up, windows broken, litter/trash everywhere -some places look broken beyond repair
it really is like a metastasizing cancer
my husband and i have also watched with great interest the documentary seattle is dying -the cry from the public and small business owners, like when did we just stop doing anything about it? we just watch it grow.. no one is DOING ANYTHING TO STOP THIS -why have they tied the hands of law enforcement officers?!?!
i ache!
i ache! with the knowledge san jose is at a fork in the road of its history
in my six years here now, i have seen san jose heading, slowly, painfully, in the direction of those fatally cancerous sections of portland and seattle we now consciously avoid, and steer any friends/family away from
i ache!
i ache! with the hope, -having had our NOTonNOBLE VICTORY, -having new leadership now, and new leadership on the way..
i ache! with the hope san jose can put the brakes on empowering criminals and start empowering law enforcement; that's the way it should be!
this post could potentially be a thousand pages long, let me point out briefly
in order to maintain law and order, we need law enforcement officers that are given the autonomy and authority to enforce the laws! -write!
in order to recruit and retain high quality law enforcement officers -we need to not just pay attention to pay & benefits, but -culture-
until we improve the culture for law enforcement officers -un-demonizing them, and giving them back the authority and autonomy that belongs to them..
anyway, we need a lot more law enforcement officers...
/side track... do you realize that by just enforcing this ONE LAW, we could save hundreds of small businesses!!
our 'homeless'
our population of drug dealers, drug addicts, criminals, mentally ill, -and small % percent of people experiencing temporary financial hardship..
our growing population of boxes, tents, garbage, dangerous make-shift shelters with any number of potentially threatening, dysfunctional/criminals loitering, panhandling, camping out purposeless and unemployed (or unemployable)
they have been ALLOWED to accumulate near small businesses..
this population and pollution is a HUGE DETERRENT for customers.
now, otherwise thriving small businesses are struggling and adding to the crisis!
-this CAUSES even more people to struggle..! small business owners, who are healthy, who are working, who are contributing.. they have enough obstacles already,
we do not want to ADD ON to the challenges any small businesses face, by allowing a decrease in their customer base DUE TO A PREVENTABLE PROBLEM!
we want to HIGHLY SUPPORT ALL SMALL BUSINESS OWNERS! in these plazas
give them a fighting chance by REMOVING ENCAMPMENTS IMMEDIATELY!
if you do not, you are contributing, consciously, to your unemployed population and crisis.
****
where should they go?
the 'temporary, immediate' relocation should be to somewhere in the outskirts! -not residential areas, not near other businesses.. not where they threaten the safety of any one
-while we continue to thoroughly, comprehensively, address the issue that threatens to turn san jose into seattle
TINY HOMES ARE NOT A SOLUTION
an ongoing frustration for me, is that the mayor, -people in leadership in any variety of cities
they talk about our homeless -that is, -our population of unhoused drug dealers, drug addicts, criminals, mentally ill, -and small % percent of people experiencing temporary financial hardship..
as if they are dealing with a fixed number
we have 6000 unhoused.. build 6000 tiny homes; problem solved
NO!!
build 6000 tiny homes, and 6000 more 'unhoused' will find their way to san jose.
your heart might be in the write place, but you are creating a HUGE INCENTIVE for even more
drug dealers, drug addicts, criminals, mentally ill, -and small % percent of people experiencing temporary financial hardship..
to fill our streets, sidewalks, businesses parking lots, open spaces, etc.
****
/back to: vandalism/destruction of property along our freeway sound walls.
we, that is, us, robert and i, and countless neighbors, -we all take care of the smaller vandalism/destruction issues within our neighborhood by taking the initiative and covering it up, cleaning it up ourselves.
that, and we have had some success by reporting it via 311.
but the sound walls.. the size, the scope,
it is too much for us, or trust me, we would have it cleaned up before you finished reading this.
what we learned, to our surprise, and education, is that these sound walls are NOT THE CITY OF SAN JOSE'S RESPONSIBILITY
the freeway sound walls are CALTRANS RESPONSIBILITY!
AND, that captures another frustration for me, ongoing.. learned during NOTonNOBLE
-just figuring out who is responsible for what, from neighborhoods, to districts, to city vs county vs state, vs citizen, vs. lawyer, vs. judge...
figuring that out, takes so much time/energy i'd love to use for other things!
anyway,
as i write this.. the message to everyone who lives in, near, or travels through san jose:
too bad.
just the way it is. nobody has done anything about, nor will do anything about it..
learn to live with it; watch it grow... -certainly from my first day in san jose, throughout the 6 years, -that has been the message i receive each time we drive to/from san jose airport, via the oakland/13th street path.. AWFUL! and without any action.. PERMANENT AWFUL...
****
i think one of the BEST, one of the BOLDEST, one of the MOST PRODUCTIVE, one of the most RESTORATIVE, STATEMENT moves anyone in san jose leadership could do write now:
to make sure, at this fork in the road in the city's history,
that we turn toward "restored to its former glory" vs. "criminals, vandals own the city"
is to MAKE CLEANING, RESTORING OUR SOUND WALLS A TOP PRIORITY
-this makes a statement, visually, for everyone who lives here, drives here, has friends/family, visit here..
makes it more attractive and healthy for everyone! business people, traveling people.. investors, guests; everyone who loves and cares about san jose
of course,
how do we un-empower the vandals we have empowered?
caught & consequences! we need to also make caught & consequences TOP PRIORITY if we ever hope to create enough disincentive that we don't have to perpetually make this a priority
ideally, it should be an IMMEDIATE, VITAL BIG PROJECT -that then requires manageable maintenance; like weeding...
anyway,
i think, the writeousmom in me thinks...
when you catch a vandal.. when you catch them, selfishly, ignorantly, destroying public property, disrespecting san jose, spreading ugliness
a) thank you! for catching them..
b) they should be made to clean up sound walls for (variable) hours.
c) they should be made to make a public apology
and
demand.. an essay where they have to write why they did it, and more importantly, why they should never do it again -this is like, parenting 101.. and it gets great results!
-what i've learned,
most people hate writing essays so much, that might, all by itself, create enough deterrent
and, on the occasions, someone enjoys writing the essay, -well, we have ourselves a writer..
on the occasions, they enjoy making a public apology, because they like an audience.. well, we have ourselves a public speaker...
on the occasions, we find someone who enjoys restoring the walls to their former cleanliness and beauty..
i mean,
it's not hopeless; that's my point.
a clean, beautiful, safe, -graffiti free- san jose...
i have my dreams.
****
QUESTION: -because in casual conversation it was shared that CALTRANS.. well for caltrans cleaning up our sacred sound walls is not a priority [that already shows..] -and robert and i, we wondered..
we wonder... like, what if the city of san jose, just took the initiative and got the job done? -with an understanding caltrans can't get to it write now... but it desperately needs addressed.
****
they are doing something write in newport, laguna, hunting beach areas... nice and clean there. attracts vs. deters people away... clear messages; law enforcement maybe?
my other dream is to go back to when our parking lot signage read: violators will be prosecuted.
now all of our parking lot warnings are to the law abiding citizens: park at your own risk.
we have to stop empowering criminals.
aren't you so excited to bring your family shopping here? ... to leave even an empty car in the lot...
more later..
in Jesus name, amen
WE SUPPORT UPSTANDING SAN JOSE POLICE OFFICERS (Robert! & Sandra!)
We support upstanding Police Officers which represent (The vast majority);
we do not support corrupt cops.
we support noble, upstanding, law-abiding, law-enforcing police officers. -san jose is in crisis write now, unable to keep, and/or recruit new officers. it is an ongoing topic of conversation for us
i want to first acknowledge the very real pain & suffering experienced by people, families, communities who have been victims of corrupt cops. at a not too long ago exhibit i visited, there were pictures of young men who had been killed by police. -the indication, is that they were killed unjustly. -and for anyone, and any loved ones, of someone unjustly killed by a corrupt cop -i understand entirely that that can shape your opinion of all cops in a life long way.
-but i do want to point out that the exhibit was restricted to exclusively that display: young men who had been (unjustly?) killed by police.
there was not, for example, any pictures, any stories about police officers who had been killed by violent criminals. -their pain & suffering. the pain & suffering of their loved ones.
and, at this exhibit, there were no pictures or stories about police officers who had saved lives, who had served their community as they were hired to do.
and there were no stories like mine. and i share it here, in a very abbreviated kind of way, with two primary motivations: 1. To demonstrate support toward, and gratitude for the upstanding police officers we do have, and will have. 2. -Because I have been rescued & restored from an enormous amount of trauma, -If you, or anyone you know, thinks healing isn't possible.. I know, with Jesus, it is.
this is what has shaped my opinion of cops, and criminals, and our justice system:
[ newspaper article regarding my testimony:
Recovering from a traumatic youth,
by Jim Ott, Tues July 24, 2007, trivalleyherald.com ]
1. At age 6 years old, I was the victim of a home invasion, kidnapping, sexual assault, by an ex-convict -which would not have happened if he were not released from prison, where he obviously still belonged. The police were notified; dusted for fingerprints; found and identified the predator, who had been recently killed by his ex-cell mate. COPS GOOD; PREDATORS EVIL; RELEASED FROM PRISON TO COMMIT MORE CRIMES. -i always like to point out, this type of predatory/evil behavior against a victim that is so young, so small, so innocent; this atrocity, the aftermath on a family, on parents, on siblings, on neighbors, on communities.. It is exclusively evil. This is not stealing to put food on the table; not stealing money for a drug addiction.. It is exclusively evil. PREDATORS of this kind, should get life in prison or just be put to death. It is my opinion, based on life experience, research, visiting the crime from every angle, years and years of contemplation, that when a predator commits a crime of this level; that predator forfeits their right to share the planet with the rest of us; period. - So that has shaped my life; -if he were not released from prison.. and, the cops were a tremendous help.
2. Age 16 years old: Successfully prosecuted and had a date-rapist sentenced to 20 years in prison; to be deported to his country of origin after serving his sentence. This shaped my life: His mug shot was already in the police books; he had been arrested but not prosecuted, by two young women, before me; that we know about, and who knows how many prior to that. PREMEDITATED, CALCULATED, EVIL. He was in the U.S. illegally. The police, the D.A., they were GOOD; HELPFUL; SENSITIVE.
3. Year later, age 17, I was ambushed at gunpoint. kidnapped. covered up. raped. had a cocked gun repeatedly shoved in my temple for -ever. while the evil predator debated out loud whether i should live or die.. the lakeside serial rapist, San Leandro, CA. His first (reported) victim, committed suicide, I was the 2nd victim (on record), there were more than 9 more, the last one (on record) was raped and also murdered; the pattern broke, and the predator remained at large. This shaped my life.. EVIL. -this is not about putting food on the table during hard times.. it is EVIL. This predator, had he been found; deserved at the very least, life in prison; at the best: death. I repeat, You forfeit your right to share the planet with the rest of us; period.
I am consciously leaving out nationality; race of the predators. I say here, all three were of different ethnicity. I have learned evil does not have a race, ethnicity.
I am a strong believer, via life experience, in 'content of character' -each & every individual, regardless of gender, age, economics, education, career, uniform, ... on and on, -each & every individual accountable for their behavior. -of course, we do have, and should always have, a distinction between minors and adults. But for violent crimes; rape; -I would lean toward permanent removal from society.
-I was also a customer in a bank, when it was robbed, and had a gun pointed at me in that traumatizing experience also.
In short, looking back now from age 56, -my youth was sabotaged; stolen. Decades healing from PTSD, while navigating all the ups, & downs, responsibilities that come in general with anyone's life.
And each of my siblings, my parents, had their life journeys and struggles, in addition to the collective family struggles.
my life experiences include (but, of course, are not limited to): unplanned pregnancy at 15 and divine intervention of a life saving miscarriage. marriage at 18, divorce at age 21; no children. engagement to be married in my late 20's; break-up before the wedding; too many different jobs, here and there, to remember.. earning an AA at Chabot Jr College in Hayward; earning a B.A. in Mass Communication from (now named) Cal State East Bay, in Hayward, all while working full time, and being the first in my family to graduate from college.
I was married in 1998 for 7 years; divorced; and..
but, this is when i started to feel my most significant healing: being blessed with a daughter, and a couple years later, a son. having children to love and raise...
post divorce; the financial struggles were unsurmountable; i lived below the poverty line for over a decade; no health benefits; part time/seasonal work; ever changing; multiple low paying jobs all at a time to keep gas in the car; food on the table; renting rooms.. always with the goal of being near my children. my children visiting me in small, but loving, living quarters; living with their dad in a beautiful home; and financially secure.
I have an entire book of 'dreams unfulfilled but never unexpressed' -looking to hit it big, if you will, as an author; speaker; artist; poet; tv host, innovator.. a percentage of my efforts toward that goal are
captured here: 
WriteousMom.com & here: MagTimeFrames.com
what is wonderful about time passing, and aging is this: what was once an epic novel; becomes vague bullet points..
and how i learned that traumatic experiences cannot be erased; but they can be successfully diluted.
this is all extremely abbreviated.. as it should be. i've been documenting and healing, and healing and documenting my entire life it seems.
it's all already here. no need to repeat. only a life in brief review:
in the aftermath of my divorce from my children's father, and thank you to my sister, working toward her own healing; i started going to church on a regular basis, and bringing my children with me..
at one time, and a wonderful time it was; my sister, her children, me, my children, our mom and her husband, all attended the same church on sundays as a family. everyone lives in different places now, but that was a stabilizing, healing, happy good stretch.
my prayer life grew; my bible study increased; i was baptized in 2010 on Valentines Day, and my relationship with Jesus grew from Sundays.. to everyday.. to Jesus is my invisible BFF.
So, 'my walk with God' as some people describe it, is a permanent part of my life now and has been for many, many years.
I had one more long term romantic relationship, a 'spiritual marriage' which terminated after 3 years.. and then 3 years not dating at all.
and then!
God blessed me with the most remarkable man I have ever met! Our meeting and falling in love and moving in together, etc. is also well documented in this blog. Also a Christian, we pray and watch church tv 7 days a week; 365.. and both of us feel God's signature on our relationship, on our families, on our friends, on our neighborhood... Robert, my sexy.. a retired deputy for Santa Clara County 27+ years. well respected by his peers, and the inmates as well; an upstanding deputy.
We met in 2017.. a blessed blend of chemistry and compatibility.. and then we got hit, together, with the traumatic murder of his sister, cynthia, in 2019; by her son, Ryan, Robert's nephew. He had also been in jail and released on a couple of prior accounts of assault; he had 'graduated' from anger management classes more than once. Had he remained in jail where he belonged, having a history of assault and battery; this murder would not have happened. THIS CONTINUES TO SHAPE MY LIFE AND MY OPINIONS... yet another criminal released to do more harm. -If the media were to cover more truth about the frequency of this... #cynthiamykkanen
and i trace back briefly here to my credentialed volunteer work for the Tri Valley Haven in Livermore; helping victims of sexual abuse, domestic abuse -common knowledge amongst the professionals, how the abusers would attend mandated anger management classes; and come out having learned how to get away with crime without getting caught.
All of these life experiences have accumulated toward the same painful understanding.
Our understanding of spiritual warfare was solid when we learned about Cynthia's murder. We knew not to give the enemy any more territory by letting it destroy our lives. I would say my determination was even higher than Robert's because I had already had so much of my life stolen.
We did all that the crisis demanded. Ryan is behind bars where he belongs for life. Robert's family is still waiting after three years for Ryan to go to trial, no quick justice. No speedy trial for the victims.
... the following year, 2020, enters the pandemic.. but again, the tools/knowledge regarding spiritual warfare we each gained independently and as a couple, by this time were even more solid..
pressed but not crushed..
our memories for 2020 are NOTHING LIKE YOU WOULD SEE if you watch the news..
God is with us. God is for us.
"we made it to due season!" Galatians 6:9
and a long, wonderful, beautiful, rewarding, season it is!
Praise be to God! 2 Corinthians 4:8-10
like Joyce Meyer.. I too had a pretty horrific start; but.. am sure having a glorious now! Even with the recent addition of our parks, schools being under threat of a 100 bed homeless tiny home site by an underhanded and negligent city council vote. God is using all things for good... We will win this! Our neighborhood is growing closer together; new friendships formed.. an over due uprising by the people who have had enough.. God gives us the strength and wisdom we need each day to move forward; is blessing us with people volunteering their time/talent/energy/experience toward our victory; answered prayers each and every one of them.
*****
I believe 100% in God, in the Bible, in Jesus as my Lord & Savior and have a deep and growing understanding of spiritual warfare.. appreciate our fleeting time here on earth; and live with the knowledge that "... I have three things to do to lead me toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love." 1 Corinthians 13:10 12-13
Praying in Jesus name for: The retention of upstanding police officers, The successful recruitment of upstanding police officers. That their pay and benefits will increase. But most importantly, that their working conditions will improve and our mass media will shine a light on the good, protective, law enforcing, life saving, peace keeping work upstanding officers are doing. We successfully weed out corruption -and the public will return to recognizing and appreciating the sacrifice and risk involved in police work of any kind. God bless and be with you! You are heroes to (me!). Hallelujah & Amen
Because of Winn-Dixie... by (me!) sandra, tvgp
part II
***
when I searched my own memory -no online research, I would describe my memories of because of winn dixie as follows..
a young gregarious girl.. who united a group of misfits in a neighborhood somewhere.
and that would have been about all I could remember.
when I asked my daughter, her memory/no research:
I remember the girl naming the dog after a grocery store and some blind lady with a bunch of bottles hanging from a tree.
allegra/no research: -
don't know if im thinking of the write book, but some part about the girl being abandoned
***
and we are all accurate to a degree; each person with vague details.. images
***
when I re-watched recently, I realized how much my age, life experiences, passing of time contributed to my seeing the entire movie through a drastically different lens of perspective and understanding
and as I watched, I just became more and more upset.
instead of seeing it as I did many years ago.. when my focus was on the friendly young girl helping strangers in a community befriend each other
I now saw it as
YET ANOTHER AWFUL AND LONG ANTI-COP COMMERCIAL
/forcing myself here to not start writing about all the prisoners/criminals being released because of covid 19.. or about the noble law enforcement officers being forced to work overtime, without any mention in media of their health risks. I will not go on and on here about how this whole 'jail time shouldn't equal a death sentence' for criminals -will in fact equal a death sentence for innocent people as drug addicts/thieves/violent criminals go free -while there is no mention of any threat for the police officers/deputies mandated to supervise the criminals. /and re-arrest, re-arrest
and I wont go on and on here about how.. really?!?! we have jail releases going on at alarming rates for actual
convicted criminals but you want our already limited number of over-stretched officers enforcing social distancing ordinances among otherwise law abiding and very unthreatening citizens
***
I have never lived through a more pro-criminal/anti-cop culture in my entire life... and I desperately pray we return as immediately as possible to a pro-cop, anti crime culture; -remember? how many times I've told you
culture is malleable! and we need to mass media, social media our way back to, or permanently towards:
crimes with consequences & punishment for criminals
respect with support & rewards for those who serve & protect
duly noting/regarding
a corrupt cop is in fact,
a criminal -we do not justify; we weed out!
and equally aware; innocent until
proven guilty..
-see what just happened...
k, so, back to Winn-Dixie, -a film which blatantly, and yet, so subtly contributes to planting anti-cop sentiments in audiences hearts & minds
when I watched it, age 54.. it's almost all I could see: this horrific message that children and adults should mock, disrespect, ignore and avoid anyone who is uniformed to serve & protect.
in because of Winn-Dixie.. the deputy, policeman character is presented as stupid, pathetic, weak and very mock-able
***
and, there is this noble message going on, about not judging people based on... but, the way it is written, that '
let us not judge but get to know' noble sentiment applies to every person in the movie EXCEPT the police officer.
/there was a missed opportunity here to INCLUDE the police officer, but
instead, we see opal befriend, an old grouchy, controlling & mean landlord; who gets an invitation to the neighborhood party..
we see opal befriend, a lonely librarian, who gets an invitation to the neighborhood party at the end of the movie
we see opal befriend, two brothers who bullied and taunted her earlier in the movie, but who get an invitation to the party
we see opal befriend a snobby school girl, and a shy school girl,
and we see opal befriend a blind, recovering alcoholic.. invited/co-hosting the party
and, my favorite, based on my own life experiences -we see 10 year old opal, befriend Otis, an adult male in his 30's?, recently released from jail -and there is zero adult supervision- of any kind
opal's father, a preacher, never even goes to meet/see/introduce himself, to this 30 year old male, who is alone in a store, with his 10 year old daughter -her dad knows
nothing about him, and yet..
when the police officer goes to assess things; he's made out to be the idiot.
the way it is written -the audience is influenced to have complete compassion for Otis, and zero respect for the police officer
but let me tell you... any parent in this day and age, who is comfortable letting their 10 year old hang out alone with a 30 year old they've never met..
so, it was hard for me to stomach the movie this time around.
we each bring our real life experiences to the fiction and non-fiction movies, books, programs we watch. we each have a real life lens, based on our age, gender, family, neighborhood..
and it is 'just a movie'
but, my real life experiences include being kidnapped/raped by predator(s) released from jail. ex-convicts; released to repeat their crimes..
my real life experiences include
polly klaas, amber alerts, megan's law `
remember
https://www.petaluma360.com/news/2219178-181/family-friends-remember-life-legacy
my real life experiences include good guys being police officers, D.A.'s, judges..
and three strikes you should be out! that might be too many...
my real life experiences include watching noble, hard working, honest, men and women who are earning a living and raising good children by serving and protecting, while they are utterly disrespected, unsupported, and over-worked -and simultaneously held personally responsible for the ugly actions/decisions/behaviors of criminals serving time in jail -FOR CRIMES.
my real life experiences include watching movie after movie, show after show, news report after news report place an ongoing magnifying glass on corrupt cops, while good cops are non-existent.
and a constant stream of 'compassion for criminal' stories, while there never seems to be any mention of the houses not robbed, the people not stabbed, the businesses not broken into, the property not damaged, the drugs not sold, the money not laundered, the people not raped, the children not molested, the violence not existing, the gang activity not growing -
BECAUSE WE HAVE JAILS
WITH CONVICTED CRIMINALS IN THEM
FOR VERY GOOD REASON(S)!!
so, this time, when I watched because of winn - dixie, -and every single person in the movie was invited to the party at the end, except the pathetic/mock-able cop
when I saw 'let us not judge' -it's okay to be a recovering alcoholic, okay to be out of jail after assaulting an officer with a guitar, okay to be lonely, okay to be mean/controlling, okay to be snobby due to a death in the family.. okay to be bullied/taunted.. on and on, etc., etc.
but not okay to be a cop? -cops are not worthy of an invitation to the 'we're all just human/we're all sinners looking for forgiveness and friendship party'
well, I thought, how can I forgive the terrible underlying message in this movie?
and, it came to (me!) in know time at all /that was on purpose.
in the sequel.. we have Winn-Dixie as a K9! dog... partnered with noble, heroic police officer(s).
in Jesus' name I pray for.... hallelujah! & amen!
****
part I:
You WINn- Dixie
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