SHADOW DANCE by (me!) sandra, ttgp
"...i'm every artist ever born, creating without warning. i'm every woman ever born, i'm blessed. i'm loved. i'm cursed. i'm a fool in love with a fisher king; on a quest to quench your thirst." excerpt from revised poem: ~ self portrait.
the intention was not one of self-healing, but rather self-expression. i caught my shadow on the ground in the backyard one day. - noticed how quickly it changed.. within about 10 or 15 minutes i went from 2ft 3" to 7ft 2". and whereas i spend as little time as possible in front of the mirror, i delighted in watching my shadow.
'round the same time, i had fallen for marc broussard and practically raced to borders to purchase his cd once i heard it. carencro; love every single song on it. every. single. one.
but this one, come around, well, it's impossible not to dance to. and so, i had it in my mind to video tape a shadow dance. this meant relocating the tri-pod whereever that might be... charging batteries for the video camera, purchasing a blank tape from walgreens..
making sure the video camera was set up in just the write location to capture just the write shadow.
too soon, and i was a short, round, bouncing ball. too late, and i'd look like an nba basketball reject. the window of opportunity for looking slightly taller than i actually am, and looking like i'm dancing, and not an abstract flame of some sort; this window of opportunity lasted about 15 minutes, tops.
but on the day before my creative adventure.. i took ill. went to the doctors with a 104 fever and was diagnosed with strep throat. felt miserable.
couldn't stand the thought of missing out on that 15 minutes of perfect sunshine the next morning. -may be a good long time before it comes again- not just the sunshine.. but this mood.
it is safe to say, before marc broussard i was never inspired to shadow dance, and i've not had the creative impulse return. so i'm thrilled i did it. thrilled i caught the mood when it hit me.
if the camera were pointing toward me, instead of the ground, you would see i looked horrible. i was colorless and sweaty; entirely physically out of shape. it fatigued me just to set up the camera and portable cd player.
but i'm tellin' ya..
the very second the music started playin' and i started dancin' i began to heal. lost in the music, dancing and having a great time under the influence of marc broussard and the morning sunshine
showered afterwards and felt perfectly fine. like, 100% normal. the strep throat which would normally last 4-6 days for me, disappeared that very day.
so perhaps self-expression IS healing.
this is my testimony.
create in joy!
posted by she @ 8:46 AM
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