Friday, April 04, 2025

WHAT'S BLOOD, got to do, got to do with it... by (me!) sandra, topps, writeousmom


 that's the song playing in my mind, tina turner's, what's love got to do with it, but i need to change and play with the words to make my point

my promise

my promise is this: when it comes to true love:  TIME  -quality time together; getting to know each other is far drastically more important a factor; than blood; biological connections themselves, do not result in love.

we live in a time when great emphasis is placed on  -blood; dna..  our ancestry

i repeat here, when it comes to my day to day life, my decision-making, my behaviors, my relationships..  on and on.  -being a CHRISTIAN is far, far, far more important and relevant than any 'dna' report results sharing about ancestors i never have and never will meet; living in times severely different from today in places i'll never visit. 

but i bring this up for a different reason.  my motivation is a conversation i had some time ago with our daughter in  law; mother of our 3rd grandson..

we are a blended family  -they are family through marriage not blood

and i was holding, loving on our youngest grandson..   staring into his eyes..  falling deeper in love..

when our daughter in law commented..   [something like, not verbatim]; bet you'll love it even more when your daughter and son have babies..

      did she say 'even more?'     maybe yes, maybe no, but my immediate (and admittedly potentially incorrect interpretation) was that she was making a distinction between loving a biological grandbaby vs a through marriage grandbaby

my immediate internal reaction was..   defensive..

another promise i can make write here and now:   i could not love and adore all 3 of our grandchildren more than i do..  i am crazy in love with each one!

do i love this precious grandchild from God i'm holding in my arms..   less than i will one day love my future biological grandchildren from God

this is a very clear and very easy no.     

but not without an important distinction; not without a caveat..

i have known my son, via marriage, only 8 years..    but we have spent a lot of time together..  living together for a bit.. traveling together; long road trip together...   deep conversations and many of them..

i have known my daughter in law, his wife, only 6 years (?)..    and we have spent -some- wonderful time together..  weeks at time, 

i love them both! and now i love all three of them!  son, daughter, grandson..    no blood relations needed or required

the reason IT WILL BE DIFFERENT when my own, biological adult children, gift us with grandchildren is because..

i have know them  -deeply known them-  and crazy loved them from inside my womb!  the relationships are long and deep..  from skinned knees & first days of school (pre-school, elementary, middle, high, college..)  -every dentist appointment, birthday party, Christmas, broken heart, best friend,   -favorite shows, what makes them laugh, cry, scare, brave..   the list is too long, but you get the idea..   years and years worth of time together...

this TIME TOGETHER usurps any and all other factors, like dna, when it comes to true love.

so, while my LOVE, will not be greater with biological grandchildren..  i have no doubt, it will be different; enormously rewarding: getting to see my babies, have babies..  when my parents graduate to great grandparents..

what i share here has been proven out time and time and time again..   just sharing this common knowledge in my own words, based on my own life; adding to the choir of love songs

LOVE DOES NOT REQUIRE, is not at all dependent on a biological/blood connection. 

it is most definitely not: the more blood you share, the more love you feel..

it is most definitely: 

a great pleasure, rewarding honor getting to know and fall in love with each other; which is directly and inextricably dependent on time. 

wait.

     in no time at all! i fell in love with our grandsons..

3 seconds tops!   love at first sight! 

i crazy loved you from the very start!

  if it's not reliant on time?  nor dependent on blood..

could it be...  love's a natural spring from our hearts? 

 

      what's blood, got to do, got to do with it..  what's blood but a flesh consideration.. 

In  i-spend-a-lot-of-time-with-Jesus, name..      God IS love.

hallelujah & amen. 

posted by SANDRA MICKANEN @ 10:47 AM 0 comments

Thursday, April 03, 2025

the point being... #vellumdays


 vellum days are not exclusively attached to vacation days; those are included.  vellum days are finding a thoughtful surprise welcome home gift; family dinners; romantic dinner for two; crazy good left over lasagna & italian sausage for breakfast; a little league game, delighting in the flowers and trees in bloom; "we made it to spring!"   - 'the heart seen' in the ricotta; listening to great music while spring cleaning the house, snuggling on the couch and watching a great movie/series...     some vellum days present themselves quite naturally, but we create them too; with intention and purpose..

p.s.'s

* taco, cat, goat, cheese, pizza..     "thank you!" here to my bmf, carla for the recommendation; big hit with the grandkids!  and "thank you!" here also to youtube..   watched as a family, how to play, before getting started..

* speaking of "thank you's" and youtube..

   


i listened to this album; both sides, while doing some pretty thorough, detailed spring cleaning around the house.  OUTSTANDING ALBUM!   earth, wind & fire, gratitude.   -remember i used to teach dancing to children..  movers & shakers; well, maybe not this week, or even this year..  but i am inspired to come up with some choreography to the song gratitude on this album..  have the kids perform at church..     hallelujah & amen

* also,   snuggled on the couch, and binge-watched this:  


and book shelves and visual platforms are all pretty saturated, in my experience and opinion, with apocalyptic theme stories,  but..  WOW from both my husband and i on this hulu original.  so engaging! well cast, well told, well paced..     look forward to season II     "thank you!" here to solomon, AKA, FIL [Father In Law] for the recommendation. 

this is the day the Lord has made..

we have re-joyced!   and are glad in it...

hallelujah & amen. 

posted by SANDRA MICKANEN @ 10:11 AM 0 comments

#proudgrandparents

 

posted by SANDRA MICKANEN @ 9:21 AM 0 comments

Tuesday, April 01, 2025

potty talk table of 4 (robert! sandra! jack! n taryn!) #magicofmacys



if you had to guess...  what might this family of four be talking about over such a lovely, delicious, dinner?
at an elegant restaurant..   sipping from a shared bottle of the recommended tempranillo.. 

politics?  the days activities? recent memories?  plans for tomorrow?   hopes and dreams?   food allergies and allergy season?  prayer and our spiritual life? 

we covered many topics, but the stand out for me personally..    potty talk.   like, at some point we got on the subject of how our bodies do [and do not] digest certain food and beverages..

each one of us unique in our bodies reactions to this or that...  my husband jokes,  instead of dr pepper and mt dew,  i call them "dr pooper & mt. don't"

but then that lead to an entertaining circle of personal stories about our common experience of emergency trips to the nearest restroom..  and just funny bathroom experiences in general..

what i wouldn't give to be able to hold court at a table..  tell my stories verbally,  -extemporaneously, as well as i can write them..

but!  hey,  -once again, this is how blogging is such a gift to me..    

i write it better than i could ever tell it.   and in re-reading it myself, years later..    laugh pretty hard at my own embarrassing moments..   #magicofmacys

Must of been the humble pie

-and it's been too long for my son to remember what his most embarrassing story was all those years ago..   and too long for me remember too.  but!  i'm pretty confident, somewhere in my paper archives, i hand wrote down a synopsis version of what he shared with me; wanting to honor and respect his privacy at the time..   one thing to share with your mom..  another to have it published.

Thank God for plumbing and public restrooms..     hallelujah & amen

posted by SANDRA MICKANEN @ 11:03 AM 0 comments