"...i'm every artist ever born, creating without warning. i'm every woman ever born, i'm blessed. i'm loved. i'm cursed. i'm a fool in love with a fisher king; on a quest to quench your thirst." excerpt from revised poem: ~ self portrait.
the intention was not one of self-healing, but rather self-expression. i caught my shadow on the ground in the backyard one day. - noticed how quickly it changed.. within about 10 or 15 minutes i went from 2ft 3" to 7ft 2". and whereas i spend as little time as possible in front of the mirror, i delighted in watching my shadow.
'round the same time, i had fallen for marc broussard and practically raced to borders to purchase his cd once i heard it. carencro; love every single song on it. every. single. one.
but this one, come around, well, it's impossible not to dance to. and so, i had it in my mind to video tape a shadow dance. this meant relocating the tri-pod whereever that might be... charging batteries for the video camera, purchasing a blank tape from walgreens..
making sure the video camera was set up in just the write location to capture just the write shadow.
too soon, and i was a short, round, bouncing ball. too late, and i'd look like an nba basketball reject. the window of opportunity for looking slightly taller than i actually am, and looking like i'm dancing, and not an abstract flame of some sort; this window of opportunity lasted about 15 minutes, tops.
but on the day before my creative adventure.. i took ill. went to the doctors with a 104 fever and was diagnosed with strep throat. felt miserable.
couldn't stand the thought of missing out on that 15 minutes of perfect sunshine the next morning. -may be a good long time before it comes again- not just the sunshine.. but this mood.
it is safe to say, before marc broussard i was never inspired to shadow dance, and i've not had the creative impulse return. so i'm thrilled i did it. thrilled i caught the mood when it hit me.
if the camera were pointing toward me, instead of the ground, you would see i looked horrible. i was colorless and sweaty; entirely physically out of shape. it fatigued me just to set up the camera and portable cd player.
but i'm tellin' ya..
the very second the music started playin' and i started dancin' i began to heal. lost in the music, dancing and having a great time under the influence of marc broussard and the morning sunshine
showered afterwards and felt perfectly fine. like, 100% normal. the strep throat which would normally last 4-6 days for me, disappeared that very day.
this year, no complaints.. but, really, my happiest new year's eve was last year. my ex-husband went out of town for the rose bowl game, i think it was. and so, i did what any ex-wife would do under the circumstances,
i threw a party in his house.
for the kids.
and it was a really cool party too. a "shrinky dink dance party!" now, if you have never made shrinky dinks, you do not know what fun is...
first, you use paint pens in every color of the rainbow and create any picture you want on the shrinky dink plastic sheets (found at your local craft store)
that's fun all by itself, but gets way better..
next, you bake 'em. and they might not offer the same aroma as chocolate chip cookies, but what they lack in fragrance, they make up for in high stakes excitement.
i mean, the suspense! it is very important your oven have a light, so you can watch and pray.
not all shrinky dinks make it. some, during the shrinking process will fold and touch and ..."oh no! no! not mine! i worked so hard!" -and stick, and you have to start all over.
others will look like they're going to stick and be ruined, but, pray, pray, and shout out loud
sing to the shrinky dink gods! and.. watch... write before your very eyes, just when you thought your creative life was over.. your masterpiece unfolds, and lies flat, 1/9th of it's original size. -now you've got a great zipper pull, necklace, or backpack decor; whatever you want it to be.
and after we made several shrinky dinks; we danced.
we cranked up the disney tunes, spread out the balloons, put on masks, decorated each child with a colorful lei from the party store, gave em' each a silver, sparkly shaker, and let the music move them. dance, dance, FREEZE!
dance, dance, (stop the music) FREEZE!
smiles everywhere you looked.
and the party didn't stop there either. after the shrinky dinks and along with the dancing.. the kids made up there very own game, spontaneous and right on the spot
pictures on a paper in a circle, then the name of each picture in a hat. step from paper picture to paper picture (like a cake walk), and when the music stops...
name is pulled from the hat, and whoever is standing on that picture is "YOU'RE OUT!" 'til there's just one standing and "YOU WIN!"
we had a great time bringing in the new year.
and the next morning.. my kids must have played for more than four hours with the left over balloons. -and i'm not exaggerating.
they danced with them. drew on them. and made up several games.. how many balloons can you get to stay around your body without having them float up in the air? and after you surround yourself in balloons... who can walk the farthest without a balloon drifting off?
and don't tell.. but i let them take turns jumping from the couch to catch balloons from the ceiling
so far, that was my happiest new year, and it preceded the best year of my life.
