Sunday, March 10, 2013

POEM FIVE OF NINE by sandra kay

ORIGINAL POST 04/24/2006: wait. this just in... a surprise delivery from ups. -what could it be? it's not in a box. hmmm. "open it! open it!" all right already.

why, it's a rejection letter from whitegate features syndicate for our cartoon submissions from JANUARY 2005!!! 2005! and there's not one, but TWO, TWO rejections for one submission. how very #@?>&!! of them. -must cheer myself back up with a little poetry

so read "the science of love" in the week and that + mystery inspired poem 5 of 9:

i'm gonna call it: neurotictransmitters

anything but love

see. i read it right here today.
- it was just my brain, a chemical rain, of oxytocin and/or dopamine.

see. thank goodness.

anything but love

and when i think about it myself i know what it was; what it really was...

the ambiance!
the timing!
my mid-life, your break-up -reason torn from rhyming

see. i know.

but i wonder this. i wonder this... -about that interrupted kiss
was it meant to shock, surprise? prime my brain, to hypnotise?

and you in total disbelief. think i'm with agenda

"that's your hang up, not mine." wish i woulda said
when you thought out loud and i knelt by your bed

but i may have been influenced by your smile and by the wine
and so i'll leave the past before us, the future far behind

and in the present what we both unwrap
is any thing, and every thing
-makes me laugh -makes me scream -chemical rain -recurring dream
all together, so completely con-fyou-zing!

and just as you said. my pride black and blue
i don't know you well enough -at all; it's true

anything but love


it subsides.

subsides and fades away
not worth chasing what leaves us anyway

truth belongs to yesterday

so there.

it's final.

not one more quick question
twas anything but love -and the power of suggestion

yes. it was just my silly brain and the power of suggestion

i knew it all along

so now i can breathe. move forward one space
strategically avoid that smile, your face

was just a passing fury -in fact is quite blurry

i don't remember now if i really cared at all.

your true love -who knows you
your true love -she'll show you

yesterday is history
along with any mystery

and thank goodness -now really!

'cuz what a waste of time
yours, theirs and mine

on something so trivial -so utterly predictable!

no hidden treasure
caudate nucleus pleasure
and what lights up must burn out over time

oh my anything but love, my anything but love,
my anything but love

be mine.

anything but love send a sign
do i make chemicals spill in your mind?
enhance the flavor in your glass of wine?
make you hungry or thirsty -make you want me again?
remind you as humans we were born to sin?

do i reach your ventral tegmental
make you feel sentimental?

oh my anything but love

be mine.

two roads diverged in a wood, and i ---
i took the one well paved. now am a cliche'
should have went the other way

who put that fuckin' fork in the road anyway?!?

and i've just made myself laugh out loud, so that will conclude this session.

verily well, verily well.


At 7:57 AM, Blogger Jim Ott said...

wow, sandra. amazing and passionate poem... welcome back from your time away.

At 9:01 AM, Blogger she said...

big thank you jim! welcome back to you too (you back from palm springs, yes?)

off now to see if there's anything new at onlywordscansay...


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