SHEsaysWITHaSMILE.blogspot.com

3am -as remembered by (me!) about (keith!)

-too fun swapping memories..

my turn:  k. you had a few years and some experience on me.. 

so I remember..   /can't stop laughing write now..

I remember..   one time we were on the phone, and

[Thank you again God this was way before cell/camera phones.  As a matter of fact, if there is still anyone out there who questions the existence of God.. the very fact I met keith before cell/camera phones is proof enough for me...]

..yes. ..  we were on the phone, and you were being all sexy, and I was being all..   not. 

not because I didnt want to, but because I just didn't like.. know how.  

but I suppose between TV, and friends talking, and random exposure in the everyday world, I was starting to get little inklings..

but your motives when talking vs. what I was capable of picking up on and responding to...

grand canyon gap.

and I remember during one such conversation, how you made your voice all sexy, and you said to me.. 

'So, what are you wearing...'

and I remember glancing down at myself and then reporting to you.. Like,  -exactly what I was actually wearing

"Oh.. I have on my stripped long sleeve sweater with the snag in the wrist..  and my khakis..   and this necklace my friend made..   "

and probably I went on and on.. 

and probably you had to be just cracking up silently and using your imagination to create a little different outfit..

and we talked and talked ... and you no doubt kept trying to make it sexy/steamy, and I just didnt have a clue..

Until around 3am.

because vivid as my own hand is to me write now..  I remember waking up abruptly all alone at home..

and my brain was replaying our conversation over and over..

and..  how it finally hit me, I don't know, but I sure do remember the physical/mental punch..

"Oh my God..  oh my God..  When he said ..'what are you wearing..

That's when I was supposed to create a sexy looking outfit!

Sexy!!  oh my God..  What did I tell him I was wearing again?!

What I was actually Frickin wearing!!   -and the idiot award goes to... 
***

and I replayed that conversation 100 times..  and spent the rest of the night coming up with ideas for when and if you asked me that question again..

and then tormented... Because.. What if I already blew it...

***

spent the whole next week or month or maybe even year, beating myself mentally up, repeating my pathetic reply

" what are you wearing?"

"Oh..  plaid flannel pajamas..."

"What are you wearing?"

"Oh.. the hand me down Capri's my neighbor gave me last year and this top my mom bought for me on sale at the mall...  brown.  collar.  Long sleeves.  I'm not sure what fabric this is..  Let me check the tag..  polyester.  Yeah...  "

-will someone just kill me and put the world out of its misery.

***

and, but the sad part is..   dear sexy voice keith.. 

that I have no memory of whether or not you did ask me that question again, and.. 

if I was ever able to overcompensate for my disastrous unexciting literal answer...
 

posted by SHE @ 9:06 PM