SHEsaysWITHaSMILE.blogspot.com

REaD HANDED short/short fiction by (me!) sandra, tvgp

     have you ever accidentally left something behind in a hotel room? Like, flip flops or expensive shampoo, a phone charger, or, like Mr. Room 456 did last night: 1 XL black cotton stretch boxer brief.

Well, I have the pleasure of logging all such forgotten items inside a binder during my night shifts at a popular hotel. I don't find the items myself, thank God; that's another one of those jobs housekeepers are severely underpaid for. My job is just to place each item inside a clear plastic bag, fill out a report and then enter all the details in our computer system. I bet you didn't know there is a cloud in the sky that contains an e-list of every personal massager, flashlight, feather earring, chapstick and toothbrush ever left behind at our hotel. And may I brag? Because we have a 100% found and returned rating again this year. Everything from dentures to wallets and watches are ultimately returned to their -writeful owner.

Not so at the hotel 30 miles west. Thirty miles west, and if you accidentally leave something behind, -anything behind for that matter; it's gone forever. Won't do you a damn bit of good to call and ask or report it stolen. Thirty miles west the police are too busy with car-jackings and drive-by shootings to give a shit about your 2 year old's favorite pacifier.  And isn't that somethin',  how two hotels can exist on the same county map but different moral universes at the same time.

I couldn't imagine stealing anything; ever.  For one thing, I am filled with the Holy Spirit, and for two:  what would I want with someone else's acne medicine, or Cowboy hat with brown leather band.

Truth is, prior to March 17 of last year, I had never been tempted.  Up until then, my record was "so clean it squeaked."  What good is grace and forgiveness and all that if you never need it.

I rationalized as follows:  If it is not logged in, maybe it was never found.   How could they be sure they left it in the hotel room vs. on the airplane, or a coffee shop?  Also, if the owner does not call back within three days,      -scratch that.  If the owner does not call back by midnight tonight, March 17! My lucky day!  -this book is MINE.  and i'm cashin' in one forgiveness card.

Way I figured it, the book could not be worth more than say, $18; tops.  And since I didn't hesitate to return the diamond ring that was worth more than i'll make in three years, maybe I've built up a type of heavenly credit.

Plus! it's a very popular book.  millions of copies have sold all over the world.  maybe the owner already bought a new one, or doesn't even care, or, ... maybe, i'll read it, and then log it in, and give it back.  borrow vs. steal.   anyway, how could the owner know this copy is his when so many copies are floating around?

that's when I opened it for the first time.  decided I should at least check the pages for any handwritten notes in the margins, any dog-eared pages, highlights, that kind of thing.

no good, no good...  darn it! it's signed.

Oh my God... "It's signed!  It's numbered!"

According to my research, I held in my hands #48 of only #510 books personally signed by Ernest Hemingway.  Turned out - my-  $18 book was worth over $18,000!

Happened March 17, about a year ago today.  since i'm irish and Christian..  well,  I concluded I had just been blessed with some incredible luck


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is this the only fiction story on my entire blog?  I think so.

it was inspired by npr's three minute fiction contest

criteria:  under 600 words/fiction

theme:  finders keepers.  -something you found but did not intend on returning.


the contest is over -winner's story posted;  and as it was not me...

reason 25! I love my blog.   I can post the story here.

posted by SHE @ 10:15 AM