Tuesday, July 25, 2017

who is that? .... wondered (me!) sandra, tvgp

true story..

i was diggin' through boxes, necessary for memoir, and ran across this picture..

for around one second, i wondered...like, ...   who?

and then got to laughin'

"that's (me!)"    20+ years ago...


and i thought to myself..   was i ever really that young, healthy, pretty?   and this is the color original of the photograph that appears as a black n' white version on a piece i wrote for a toastmasters newsletter after earning my CTM.    this picture also represents for me, a significant turning point in my life:  BIG!

-from life was hard, traumatic and mostly sucked.. to I AM DEEPLY BLESSED.   in this picture, i am FINALLY on the other side of graduating from Cal State Hayward..  having earned  -quite slowly- my AA from Chabot Jr College, and then a B.A. from CSUH, in mass communication.  and icing:  my CTM,   -Simultaneously working full time + battling PTSD, and..   more than one failed romantic relationship...   and, moving a number of times, both places i lived, and jobs i had..         in one word:  exhausting.

..but to reward myself...       i exited officially from the repeatedly failing romantic relationship scene(s), and decided to, on my own, with family love and support,  say yes to motherhood; no to marriage...              It may go down as the single smartest, best, most blessed and life saving, life affirming, joy-spreading, love expanding catalyst for positive change decision i ever made.

that's what this picture represents for (me!)...this is when my life started to notably, experientially, turn around for the much, much, better.    -still, struggles lie ahead, but..   love; true love..  would both contribute to my healing and better prepare me for any/all spiritual battles in waiting  -which, to date,  all pale in comparison..


and speaking of love; true love..    a mother's love.    in this picture, i am in Hawaii with my best friend..  my sister.   it was a gift to me from my mom, having graduated from college [the first in my family].   -and she treated us...     she treated us to a Hawaiian vacation before she even had ever gone their herself.     -that continues to move me, even to this day..     how generous!   we had the time of our lives!


In Jesus, eternal aloha spirit, and Mother Mary's true love name..    amen.


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