Thursday, February 08, 2018

My heart belongs to Robert... (me!) ~tops

it has first of all, in my interpretation, to do with Jesus, and some very divine choreography

a match made in heaven; as the saying goes


over the past number years, if you expressed an interest in (me!), and I learned along the way that you were a commissioned salesperson     -outwardly, I'm sure I was understanding, diplomatic, I like to think, -gracious, about my exit strategy, but I would have pretty immediately had an exit strategy.

I am not judging, I am only observing.  I am aware of the importance, how many dinners have been provided, mortgage payments, kids through college,  -etc.  commissioned sales positions are responsible for..   it is just for (me!) personally.    I am not compatible, in a romantic way, with any man who makes his living this way.   you become inadvertently, highly trained in the art of bullshit..  you are rewarded, recognized, celebrated for sales..   -period.    and not whether or not the sale was justified, affordable, or necessary or appropriate for the customer. the higher you can get the profit margin

which is synonymous with  /the more you can financially screw over your customer

the more money you earn, the greater your recognition, status, rewards..

I am not attracted to masters of bullshit; although I do see its value in our capitalistic society

where I have previously described, and hold to, my definition of:

           capitalism:  when how much money you make is more important than how you make it.


and now, I currently work at alden lane nursery   -and of course, it is the sale of plants, flowers, trees, seeds, fertilizers, soil, sod, gift items, décor, etc.   that

-help keep the nursery open
-provides income/health benefits to every employee/the owners
-allows the nursery to host spectacular events, etc.

there are sales quotas to meet and exceed; yes!   as is true with any business

but, one of the things I have been enormously happy to witness, is this:

there is not one horticulturist among them who will sell a shade only loving plant, to a customer they know has a full sun backyard, just to make the sale.

but I have seen and witnessed the analogy of that in many other businesses  -where they will consciously sell anything to anyone with unjustifiable mark-ups and zero regard for customer or aftermath

I hungered to be in an environment and around professionals who value people over sales.  it makes me very proud to work there.

so, my point is this  -if Robert, even with his sexy smile and sexy dancing and gorgeous body..  even with his Christian beliefs, and single status,  -devoted father, strong work ethic, great cooking

        -if Robert shared with me that he was a commissioned sales person..

my heart would have retreated immediately.


and if you expressed an interest in (me!) over the past number of years..  and say, tried to impress me with your giant fancy home..

-retreat. ten steps slowly backwards..   now run!

here's why:  I don't want to have to be all uncomfortable and worried all the time about things looking just so.  about a house that needs to be perpetually in magazine cover shoot mode.   it's exhausting.   -these beautiful homes!  and they are beautiful..    see architectural digest magazine:    but, you're never supposed to be able to tell a human has been there..     pristine = I have to be too careful all the time

I prefer comfortable to careful.

If Robert brought me to his architectural digest style home..   I would not look and think, "beautiful!  and he's rich!"   I would think,  "oh no...   I'm exhausted just looking at it.."

so, this is in part,  -how he seduced me, Robert..

by not having a commissioned sales position, but a noble profession; and great work ethic

and by having a comfortable, you can be yourself, relax and enjoy atmosphere in his home..

 I am fascinated by how compatible we are..   Spiritually matched.  Energy matched.  Love of God, life, each other; just like he pointed out..  friends, family, dancing, partying,   -work hard/play hard/pray hard


and now, I am just so, so grateful, Robert is not an alcoholic, and/or a vegetarian.    because "neither am I!"

and, I enjoy wine tasting..   mimosas, beer, a drink or two when I go out dancing..

social drinking is off limits for alcoholics   -the way seafood is off limits for people who are allergic to..

and I have friends who do not drink alcohol when we go out..  it's not a super big deal.  it's just that it is a blessing that we can, and do,  both of us,  enjoy wine tasting, mimosas, beer, etc.   it's something we can do together.


I understand the benefits of vegetarianism..  but I am not one.  I love lunch meats, steaks and bacon.. none of these are restrictions for me..

and none of these are restrictions for Robert..   we both love a sunday brunch that includes a mimosa and blt..   we enjoy them equally and together.

I wouldn't run in the other direction if you told me you were an alcoholic or a vegetarian..

but it would slow my momentum..

and it just feels like an added blessings that Robert and I have these things in common also.

all of this factors in..


where we are currently not a match:  physically.

when he flexes his arms..    my, my, my..

and I just flexed my mine..

and so there is some definite work to be done..     but I have every intention of doing it..

and we are going to do that together also..

my heart and my body belong to Robert.    and I have a feeling i'm gonna be not sleeping with my very personal trainer very soon and very often..

I call it all cross-training; yes I do.

hallelujah and amen!     "Thank You!"  Jesus for my Robert..    xoxo  I love him so   ~tops.


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