Its a little blurry, but fine. The Martha Stewart Story. by (me!) sandra, tvgp
-Martha Stewarts name has come up more than 3 times in one week, in what seems like, totally random, unrelated conversations, involving different people at different times,
but for me.. in the first conversation I hear it softly:
Like, blah, blah, blah, martha stewart, blah, blah, blah..
then when i hear it again, different person/time/conversation, but same day, it sounds like:
blah, blah, blah, -Martha Stewart- blah, blah, blah...
but by the third time, different person/time/totally different conversation.. when i hear it again, say the next afternoon, it sounds like:
blah, blah, ~ !!MARTHA STEWART!! ~ blah, blah.
***
so, silently, internally, i said.. 'i know what you are doing.. and i do not want to revisit that story.. '
***
then i got home all tired, and threw my scarf over my desk chair, -at least that's where i was aiming, but then it hit a little jewelry dish on my desk, which had a small plastic container of fine, gold, glitter resting in it; and knocked it over on the floor.
it was not open, and so i was without any glittery mess to clean up, but when i picked it up,
!!!*** M A R T H A ***!!!*** S T E W A R T ***!!!
and so, i was like, ' -fine! i surrender already, I'll write the frickin' story... AGAIN! -but its a little blurry. -which is how i prefer it, by the way.. if i have to choose between clear, and it can't be permanently erased.
and I'm only bullet pointing!'
***
* i spend inordinate amounts of time, money, creative energy experimenting, experimenting, experimenting, until I found what seem to be
1. the perfect foundation: wood/1/4" wide, 5x7
2. the perfect size, texture, gauge of metal.
3. the perfect pull strength, size, flexibility of magnet
* i create a kit.. /skipping many adventures here, but..
* i go door to door, cold calling independent scrapbook stores
* i demonstrate my Mag Time Frames... and literally... literally! the store owners and the customers.. GO WILD!
"Oh my God! Do you have a patent,? /multiply that all out by hundreds.. -everyone LOVES it..
trade show/advertising/marketing.. workshops/cold calls/demos/commercials.. TV shows, blah, blah
blah, -MARTHA STEWART-!
her show called! (Me!)! "Mag Time Frames on Martha Stewart!"
* after being severely deceived and undermined by The carol duvall show.. maybe... You know, maybe this was my true big break!
So:
I return the call.
leave a message on the recorder.
hyperventilate. have a panic attack. can't breathe.
I think I said my name, but when I went to leave my return number:
"... 4...84... and then... a big, loud, long scream...
which would have been perfect for a horror film, I promise you. -quite an impressive scream. I hung up.
not my best day, or best moment. And the business itself never really got off the ground and I ended up in bankruptcy, a chapter 13 or 11? Can't remember.. I made payments for 5 years..
***
but write around the time of my scream call, Martha Stewart was sentenced to her jail time.
-not her best day, or her best moment either.
***
we've both recovered. and last I saw of her was the Justin beiber roast.. and I thought she stole the show... Super funny!
***
so there you have it
My Martha stewart story; again. -now I trust you will leave me alone.
1 Comments:
i think i have this a little bit wrong.. i think there is a wider time gap between my scream call.. and Martha going to jail. i think, after some time passed, and i felt strong enough to try again, -shoot for redemption.. by the time i went to try again.. she was sentenced.
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