SHEsaysWITHaSMILE.blogspot.com

Public "thank you!" To unknown from (me!) Sandra, tvgp

Dear unknown kind person.. "Thank you!!".  I feel as if I was divinely guided to circle around and drive by those golf clubs next to the handwritten 'free stuff' paper sign.  " FREE?" I said to myself, "that's my favorite price!".    I said thank you to the sky in case it might reach you and then carried them to my writeousmom-mobile half concerned someone might  come running after me yellin' " STOP! THIEF!  ..  those are mine..."

You never know these days; so many divorces and all..  Maybe one spouse got pissed off at the other spouse.. And just put the others spouses shit out on the sidewalk with a FREE SIGN on it..

I've seen much worse..

But.. Upon examination..  All the dust, yellow, stringy, mildewy, spiderweb-like adhesive that was stuck all around the bag..  And the rust on the clubs themselves..

Seem safe to guess they just hadn't been used in years; were buried under who knows what in a basement which  -perhaps inspired by a sudden move, or particularly influential episode of hoarders.. Was now being cleaned, decluttered and organized.  I don't know.. I just excel at projecting..

Anyway.. "The timing!".  Here I've been on like,  3 hot dates now, with who I affectionately, sarcastically refer to as husband #3, at the golf range hitting buckets of balls with HIS clubs..

Now..  God being the creative choreographer he is..  " I have my very own!"

I took the bag this very morning to the AM/PM station where they have a supersonic vacuum for 4 quarters..   So, if anyone is keeping track.. My free golf clubs are now $1.

I vacuumed best I could..   Let me just say they did not come out 'looking bran new'.   So I took them to the dry cleaners where they explained the bag would not fit in their machine...   My best bet is the car cleaners where they professionally detail cars..  But that has to wait because I was only like, a football field away (see how naturally sports related things roll of my tongue now..) From the golf range.. So..

Today I paid $7 two times for what amounted to "120!" Balls.

And I'd like very much to tell you that I hit all 120 balls..

I did in fact swing at all 120 balls..

And in conclusion I would like to tell you the same thing I told the man at the register -twice- who gave me change for my $20.  /he was hard of hearing:

"I've never enjoyed sucking at something so much in my whole life."

"IVE... NEVER ENJOYED SUCKING AT SOMETHING SO MUCH IN MY WHOLE LIFE.."

And I couldn't have been there today without you; unknown kind person..

posted by SHE @ 6:52 PM