SHEsaysWITHaSMILE.blogspot.com

ON WAITING WELL by (me!) sandra, tvgp

it is in the top ten list of spiritual lessons required for a peaceful, happy, productive life. we have to, we must learn; to wait well. we certainly do lots of it! wait in line, wait for the next pay day, wait for the next movie, book, special occasion, holiday, vacation; wait to feel better, wait for the call, wait for the punchline, wait until.. just you wait. on and on, etc. etc. wait weight, weight wait. like write now, i'm waiting very patiently for december 4th to hurry up and get here! i think. i'm trying not to count down the days, or be all pre-occupied by it.. or day dream so much, or lose sleep... but can you imagine!? k, -sometimes, when i want to come up with something to write, or comment on leonard's blog.. and i want it to be both funny and poignant, i put my hands in the air, close my eyes, and i say out loud in a soft whisper, "maya, maya, maya. robin, robin, robin.." sometimes i add in other names too, but i always default to those two.. or if i only say two names, those are the two i say. maya, of course, for Dr Maya Angelou. and robin, for Robin Williams. it is my effort to ask them, to invite their spirit to join with mine, and help me out.. sometimes i say that too.. "help me.. maya, maya, maya, robin, robin, robin.. come help" -and next thing i know, my fingers have found something to say. "thank you!" -they come through for me (to me?) like, almost every time. what category does this fall in? superstition? metaphysics? spiritual? telepathy? delusion? i don't know. i only know it seems to work, and the magical part, or miraculous part, depending on which way you bend -is that they don't even know me! i don't for one second, imagine that either one of them, is somewhere in the world, and is suddenly interrupted, like, "wait.. i think i here someone calling my spirit..." it all happens behind the seens. some combination of imagination, and.. verve, maybe. it is a different experience than the spiritual, unseen, connections i experience with loved ones in my family that i've known my entire life...and know and love me back. in any case, -knowing this.. can you imagine the reaction of my heart when my handsome prince told me he heard on 102.9 that Dr Maya Angelou was going to be in oakland in december?! now.. i am literally in the process, write now, (including TODAY!) of writing Kissin' the Chocolate Blues, which is a performance valentine TO: Dr Maya Angelou, from me.. scheduled for the firehouse art center, february 11th, 2014.. and keep in mind, i've written her several letters (never heard back), and have seen her lecture 3 (4?) times, but never -never- for one reason or another, got the chance to -see- her, get a book autographed, get a picture.. shake her hand. hug her and never let her go... /it's a wonder.. and i do have her autograph in books, and framed... yes. but i had to mail off for them. and that's better than nothing, of course.. but it is not the same as having her sign it, in front of you.. and get a picture. so.. thank you to my handsome prince.. here comes my 4th chance; maybe. to be honest.. i'm just glad to see her again, and am perfectly prepared for it to be just like the other times.. close, but not that close. anyway.. can you imagine my heart again, when i started looking up the event.. a celebration of the co-founders of glide memorial.. 50 years.. serving the community.. and this long list of celebrities.. which included -guess who else?!? Robin Williams!! -now- if that ain't Jesus at work, i don't know what is.. maya, maya, maya, robin, robin, robin... IN THE SAME ROOM! i pray to Jesus.. i pray.. please can i meet them.. like, shake their hand meet them... like, get a picture with them, meet them, ... but, please Jesus, if you let me meet them.. can i not make an entire idiot of myself.. and you know what fascinates me.. how utterly perfectly i can pull up their faces in my imagination.. how do we do that? i'm going to close with this: on one of the autographed papers i mailed away for, and have framed.. it reads, in part, "strength! to your writing hand, joy!" -she has a great signature! big, bold, beautiful writing.. just gorgeous. anyway.. i kept going, like, strength.. strength?.. strength to my writing hand? why didn't she say, energy? or success? -why strength? what does she mean by that? joy i get. but strength..? and then -one day, a friend of mine was telling me that her, and her husband had fallen on hard times.. he was being laid off, and their security was at risk.. and having seen a variety of marriages collapse under even less pressure/testing.. i found myself praying for them. one of the things i said was, -strength to their marriage during this time of stress.. i pray they make it through with their marriage still intact.. and then! i understood.

posted by SHE @ 12:37 PM