Spiritual Hemostasis; in the aftermath of an unexpected death -mrs sandra mickanen sharing
i could have sworn i wrote about this before, but the keyword is not pulling up anything from my blog.
essentially, it is the vision i see, -a solid analogy for:
when you learn of a death
when someone you love, someone you know, or once knew -dies; suddenly.
for all death really; but especially when that death is too soon and unexpected -what happens is that, friends and family, both close and distant, they will reach out, show up,
co-workers, neighbors, acquaintances; friends of friends who once knew..
a collection of people will contact and/or surround you.
this happens instinctively.. it is what we do; we are not taught this in school.. it is not something we learn to do or are obligated to do; it is something we naturally do
despite not knowing what to say.. despite understanding we cannot undo the death..
with only grace and understanding when we are met with resistance, anger, confusion
whether our loving condolences are welcomed and appreciated or resisted and rejected;
a collection of people with loving hearts and good intentions will directly or indirectly contact and/or surround you. and we certainly experienced this when robert's sister cynthia was murdered.
and the vision i have, is of hemostasis..
as hemostasis is for a physical injury; this internal & innate response our bodies already have which stops the bleeding after a physical injury; preventing hemorrhage
a type of spiritual hemostasis is what i see in the aftermath of the death of a loved one(s); this immediate gathering of loving people
their presence; their calls; their texts; their emails; their gifts; their meals; their desserts
their outreach;
they help stop the emotional bleeding; they prevent an emotional hemorrhage, if you will
-emotional coagulation; by whole human beings accumulating not just individual cells
they help absorb the shock; so it can be divided up and distributed; no longer an overwhelming, unbearable weight carried by one individual; or a stoic but unready, unequipped few..
the way the human body kicks into hemostasis gear automatically for the individual suffering a physical injury; a collection of human beings kicks into loving gear for people suffering an emotional injury; a sudden loss; a broken heart..
they target and slow the emotional blood flow..
form a temporary, but vital plug, of sorts..
serve as a kind of fellowship fibrin..
and all of it matters; all of it contributes to healing; all of this happens automatically.
we are beneficiaries of these rather miraculous automatic processes; both physical and spiritual
i am once again a witness,
extended family; in the distance... family members who have not connected for years.. -reconnected.
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family bonds do not answer to time, space or distance; once established; like love itself, they are eternal.
my last in person visit with my cousin Evan was circa 2011, in New York..
nothing but good memories..
our side, my side of the family.. despite long gaps between visits.. everyone reaching out to his dad, his sister..
everyone crying, hugging, in disbelief..
-having been forced to face and navigate life from a very young age without his mom, who died from skin cancer -my beautiful aunt susie...
-and now Evan's sister.. without a mom and brother..
-and their dad.. without the mother of his two children; and now without his one and only son..
just hurts. hurts for survivors on earth..
helps to envision the beautiful spirits of deceased loved ones reunited in heaven;
helps to turn to God for comfort.. to count on and receive that comfort.
helps to pray for that comfort to reach everyone who loved and knew Evan..
God's love embrace you
comfort and console you
in the epicenter of all you're feeling
God's love remind you
inside and all around you
love grieves a path toward healing
-reaching out with prayer, love, condolences -God's strength as you process and navigate through this very difficult experience. amen & amen
written in 2025
selah, amen. amen.
Memorial Mural in La Jolla, Ca
United Methodist Church Pre-school
where she was a Director.
posted by SANDRA MICKANEN @ 4:07 PM
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