SHEsaysWITHaSMILE.blogspot.com

Passing of the Velcro Baton (grandma sharon! to granddaughter taryn!)

 December 2022 

my daughter agreed and accepted the baton from my mom at last year's Christmas Cookie Exchange & Brunch

so, 2022, became the last year my mom would host her cookie exchange & brunch 

and 2023 is the very first year my daughter (her granddaughter) will host this holiday celebration; very steeped in grandma's traditions

my mom has been doing some album hunting..   and while we've been guessing she's been hosting these cookie exchange brunches some 30+ years, 

turns out she has an album dating back to 1982!

so, "Congratulations! & Thank You Mom!"  for your cookie exchange & brunch that has helped kick start the holiday season for your friends and family for 40! years...     -awesome!  -fantastic! -wonderful!

****

the handing over of the baton from grandma to granddaughter, however, has not been quick or easy..

taryn reached out with an open hand, and my mom, as if the baton were wrapped in velcro, had to kind of tug and pull the baton out of her own hand..

and then she did hand it over to her granddaughter; but struggled to actually let go...

****

so, it was fun for me to eavesdrop on their conversation during our drive to valley fair recently for girls shopping day (mostly at macy's);  my daughter was driving, my mom front side passenger, me in the back

and i heard my mom "honey..   i asked you to host.. and now i just need to let you do it... i keep telling you how to do things and i need to just let you do it your own way..."

i was very impressed to hear this confession, but who can blame my mom..

40 years!

the changes my daughter is daring to make, are changes all of us, born anywhere from the 1940's to the 1970's have been forced to make

changes we've all tried to stop, slow down or totally avoid;  unsuccessfully. 

****

let us start with the online invitations...    online.  via text.  digital.  computers.  phones.

one of the biggest (but certainly not only) changes is that my daughter is not sending beautiful paper invitations through the united states postal service.    -no pretty holiday stationery...  no cute holiday stamps... no handwritten, personalized addressed envelopes..

as a matter of fact, i am staring write now at the cutest holiday stamps from usps, that my mom gave me money to purchase specifically for taryn to use; but that will not be used (for this party).

my mom hoped  (and, as did i) that in addition to the online invite, there could be pretty paper invites..

    -going paperless in general is a huge challenge; but for invitations!?!

and going paperless, for someone like myself, who loves paper..       ouch to the sting from this paper cut! 

this is the way of her generation however; we must bend and not break...   or, in paper lovers language; score but not tear

in any case..

my daughter is highly gifted and enormously talented at graphic design; she is a natural.  self-taught on canva, and she created very beautiful and very elegant online invitations

and it is fun that you can see online, when you rsvp by clicking..   who is attending.. what cookie they are baking..

what do you mean you have friends 

that aren't baking cookies!?!  

the fact that her granddaughter was allowing anyone to come to a cookie exchange without having homemade cookies to exchange...

   what's my best analogy..

well, that would be like,    -going to a gift exchange without a gift to exchange

  -the best way i can describe this changing of the guard, if you will, is this:

for 40 years my mom hosted a Christmas Cookie Exchange & Brunch

but what her granddaughter will be hosting is: 

"A Christmas Party!" where some cookies will be exchanged.

****

so, my mom is in a reluctant and slow surrender.. 

   -my daughter has been trying to explain that her friends, the 20 somethings, relatively fresh graduates, do not all live in places conducive to baking 14 dozen cookies; there is a general lack of the necessary accoutrements;  the cost, the space, baking experience; baking tools, the availability of time itself...

all valid..  

but still,  

-there won't be paper invites anymore; and not everyone invited is required to bake cookies.   --with grandma, this was mandatory; with granddaughter this is optional.

a phone call here, a text there, a suggestion here, a compromise there..

all in all, 

it started awkwardly progressing, this passing of the velcro baton.

then i got a call.

from my daughter.

she was counting on me to immediately understand what my mom was having a hard time figuring out..

but i was like, 

-i don't understand either.  

what?  dozens of cookies by two's? three or six what?  are you grouping people together in smaller groups or not, i'm lost..   i already prepared my creative packaging!  you can't change this is on me write now..

is this new math?"

  -because this was another change my daughter was making.

        /and if you are keeping track, that's a lot of changes from 40 years basically the same to different now

  -some history:

let's say my mom invited 12 people.  the RULE was... you bake 12 dozen of the same cookies!  12 dozen!  the same number of people attending.  easy math!   and you package by the dozen; creatively!   but everyone bakes a different cookie... so that:  the exchange part of the cookie exchange means that you leave the celebration with 12 different types of cookies!

now this new change started messing with my mind too..  " i'm confused..."

   -because just a few days before, i thought my daughter had a brilliant idea:

if 15 people were going to be baking (skipping here the ones allowed to come who are not baking..);

but if 15 people are baking; rather than have to bake 15 dozen cookies;  -everyone bake 5 dozen, and then she would sit people in smaller groups of 5.. and each group of 5 would exchange..

     -my mom:   i don't understand.. what group am i going to be in?  

     -me to mom:  i think this might be easier actually..   if you think of it, as like, 5 individual exchange parties but all under one roof kind of thing..

****

but at last...   not only does taryn have exquisite design skills; but excellent written communication skills..

let me show you:

so, now.. it all makes sense!  

and, this might be the least amount of baking anyone has had to do in the last 41 years..

but this has certainly been the most entertaining passing of the velcro baton. 

***

robert & i share our favorite pre-party saying with taryn:

"this is going to be the best Christmas Party/Cookie Exchange you've ever had

     -but not the best Christmas Party/Cookie Exchange you'll ever have!"

*****

                 -what do you mean you are not playing LCR!?!   

AS recent as today,  during our Thanksgiving Dinner, my mom, my daughter and i were re-discussing the upcoming Cookie   Christmas Party with a Cookie Exchange

and there is going to be a fairly large number of people in attendance...  LCR works well for 8 to 12 people, but double that, and...    

so, my daughter didn't include LCR in the invitation..

this became a loooong conversation, where my mom was gently trying to persuade...    maybe you can break it into two groups...   there sure is a lot of laughter and fun...     

and to tell you the truth, i don't even remember how the conversation ended, but i never did hear my daughter 100% agree..

so, made me laugh again, because when my mom packed her bag to take home..   with the albums from previous years and a few other goodies for the upcoming event..

    -if you look close; she placed the LCR game in the bag too.

i'm really proud of my mom.  she started a great tradition; kept it going for 40 years.. she crazy loves her granddaughter,  and even though she is grateful, that doesn't make this easy.

and i am really proud of my daughter.  she willing accepted the velcro baton; she is going to host a blast of a party.  she crazy loves her grandma, and she doesnt want to disappoint, but is going to hostess her own creative, and more modern way.      -many companies have to make these transitions:  from decades of basically the same to the new now.  i am very impressed with how my daughter has been navigating all this; i think she'd make an awesome CEO. 

****

this space saved for 2023 pictures.

Merry Christmas Everyone!  and Every Generation...   

sample pictures from the more recent archives:

    

   

   

  

  

plus photo albums that date back to 1982.

posted by SANDRA HARRISON KAY @ 6:15 PM